The following appeared in the editorial section of a local newspaper:
Nearly 70% of employers blamed inadequate training for the shortfall in skilled workers, yet 70% of education-providers believe they suitably prepare graduates for the jobs market. Similarly, employers complain that less than half of the young whom they hire have adequate problem-solving skills, yet nearly two-thirds of the young believe that they do have such skills.
The author here talks about the issues faced by the employers in finding skilled workers. The above argument says that 70% of employers blame the training provided by the educational institutes for the shortfall of skilled workers, while on the other side 70% of education-providers claim of providing adequate training and preparing graduates for the market. The argument also states that the employers find less than half percentage of employees having the adequate problem solving skills wherein two third of the young claim to have the skill. In order to come to a conclusion for the above argument, the author is lacking with some statistics and data to make the argument stronger.
Firstly, as per the data stated by author on the claims made by employers and education-providers, seems to have loopholes and clarity about the data. Author has failed to mention the number of employers considered during the survey also the area of education institutes they hire from. On other hand employer has not specified number of institutes or education-providers involved in the survey, and whether they contribute to the same area or colleges the employers hire from. There might be case where the surveys might be taken in completely different regions or the institutes and education-providers involved in the survey and not been visited by the employers targeted during the survey. There might be a possibility that employers may get good skilled workers if they do hire from surveyed education-providers as claimed by them.
Secondly, to make the argument stronger, author could have provided data as what training the employers expect young to pursue to build the required skills. This could have helped to understand if the institutes targeted for the survey did provide the required training. If true then this would have strengthen the argument form the employer’s side. Due to lack of such data or lack of analysis of institutes before the survey weakens the argument raises various questions before jumping to any conclusions.
In the second part of the argument, author talks about the lack of problem-solving skills found in the young while two third of the young claim to have such skills. As the argument talks about the skilled workers not specifying any particular skill required by the employers, targeting one skill and providing data regarding the employee's efficiency in it cannot be considered as only factor of comparison. There might be a possibility that the employee lacking in problem-solving skill might be good at other skills required by the employer.
Looking into various points and loopholes in the survey and analysis doe by the author, the argument fails to decide on which area needs to be improved and whose claim among employers and education-providers is right. Hence the author should have a deeper study on the skills required, participating employers and education-institutes before concluding to the argument.
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| 2018-08-13 | ShrutiUrkude | 63 | view |
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| 2016-09-28 | mayan2729 | 66 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 474 350
No. of Characters: 2441 1500
No. of Different Words: 196 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.666 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.15 4.6
Word Length SD: 3.086 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 175 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 129 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 101 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 62 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.333 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.409 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.611 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.386 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.557 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.146 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 361, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...and preparing graduates for the market. The argument also states that the employers...
^^^
Line 5, column 301, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'strengthened'.
Suggestion: strengthened
... training. If true then this would have strengthen the argument form the employer's s...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 330, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'employees'' or 'employee's'?
Suggestion: employees'; employee's
... skill and providing data regarding the employees efficiency in it cannot be considered a...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 8, column 219, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...oyers and education-providers is right. Hence the author should have a deeper study o...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, hence, if, look, may, regarding, second, secondly, so, then, third, while
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 19.6327345309 51% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 11.1786427146 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 11.0 28.8173652695 38% => OK
Preposition: 76.0 55.5748502994 137% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 16.3942115768 122% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2490.0 2260.96107784 110% => OK
No of words: 474.0 441.139720559 107% => OK
Chars per words: 5.25316455696 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.66599839874 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.15302257993 2.78398813304 113% => OK
Unique words: 206.0 204.123752495 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.434599156118 0.468620217663 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 755.1 705.55239521 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 5.0 8.76447105788 57% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 26.0 22.8473053892 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.0496142763 57.8364921388 83% => OK
Chars per sentence: 138.333333333 119.503703932 116% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.3333333333 23.324526521 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.55555555556 5.70786347227 97% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.212736820648 0.218282227539 97% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0827080377722 0.0743258471296 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0988226948676 0.0701772020484 141% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.13045764382 0.128457276422 102% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0941776506636 0.0628817314937 150% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.5 14.3799401198 115% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.09 48.3550499002 93% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 12.197005988 110% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.47 12.5979740519 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.09 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 95.0 98.500998004 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 12.3882235529 109% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 11.1389221557 111% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.