The following appeared in a health magazine published in Corpora.
"Medical experts say that only one-quarter of Corpora's citizens meet the current standards for adequate physical fitness, even though twenty years ago, one-half of all of Corpora's citizens met the standards as then defined. But these experts are mistaken when they suggest that spending too much time using computers has caused a decline in fitness. Since overall fitness levels are highest in regions of Corpora where levels of computer ownership are also highest, it is clear that using computers has not made citizens less physically fit. Instead, as shown by this year's unusually low expenditures on fitness-related products and services, the recent decline in the economy is most likely the cause, and fitness levels will improve when the economy does."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
In the statement, the author argues that the fitness levels will improved when the economy does. To bolster this, the author mentions that levels of computer ownership will not influence to the citizens fitness level. however, the argument is tenuous in several aspect and the evidences used are not enough to justify a causal relationship between the performance of economy and the fitness level.
The author mentions that some medical experts state that currently only one-quoter of corpora’s citizens meet the standards for adequate physical fitness, whereas twenty years ago one-half of the citizens met the standards. however, the base number of citizens is not provided. it is possible that twenty years ago, there were only 10000 people living in corpora, and now the population has increased ten times. thus, the datas are incomparable. also, the author unfairly assumes that those experts are reliable. it is possible that the data presented by the experts are not reflective of the actual situation and maybe the survey used to collect the data are poorly designed thus lead to a unrepresentative results.
it is stated by the author that fitness levels are highest in regions of corpora where levels of computer ownership are also highest. however, the author groundlessly assume that there are no other factor that contribute to the high level of fitness in those places. it is possible that there are a lot of parks located in those places, which provides more spaces for the citizens to workout and exercise. it is also possible that citizens living in those areas are all athletes, so their fitness levels are above average.
there is also a hidden assumption that decline in economy is associated with low level of fitness. even if the usage of computer will not influence the physical fitness level, it does not mean that there is an absolute relationship between economy and fitness. it is possible the decline in fitness level observed when economy is poor is only a coincidence. also, the author unreasonably assume that the spending on fitness-related product is an indicator of economy performance. Perhaps, the low expenditures on products and services for fitness is caused by increased in spending on other things such as travel, shopping on clothes. even if the economy is actually going through depression, it is possible that the low level of fitness is merely a coincidence.
In sum, the author’s argument is logically flawed and the evidence used to support the statement are also groundless and feeble. To strength it, the author should conduct a deep and comprehensive survey to substantiate the relationship between economic activity and citizen’s fitness level.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 10 15
No. of Words: 438 350
No. of Characters: 2214 1500
No. of Different Words: 184 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.575 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.055 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.686 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 182 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 140 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 85 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 43.8 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 27.393 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.7 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.428 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.726 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.115 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 66, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: 'improve'
Suggestion: improve
...hor argues that the fitness levels will improved when the economy does. To bolster this,...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 195, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'citizens'' or 'citizen's'?
Suggestion: citizens'; citizen's
...ter ownership will not influence to the citizens fitness level. however, the argument is...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 219, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...nfluence to the citizens fitness level. however, the argument is tenuous in several asp...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 255, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun aspect seems to be countable; consider using: 'several aspects'.
Suggestion: several aspects
...el. however, the argument is tenuous in several aspect and the evidences used are not enough t...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 230, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...half of the citizens met the standards. however, the base number of citizens is not pro...
^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 284, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...ase number of citizens is not provided. it is possible that twenty years ago, ther...
^^
Line 11, column 418, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Thus
...the population has increased ten times. thus, the datas are incomparable. also, the ...
^^^^
Line 11, column 452, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Also
...imes. thus, the datas are incomparable. also, the author unfairly assumes that those...
^^^^
Line 11, column 519, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...ssumes that those experts are reliable. it is possible that the data presented by ...
^^
Line 11, column 695, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...e data are poorly designed thus lead to a unrepresentative results. ...
^
Line 11, column 714, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'result'?
Suggestion: result
...esigned thus lead to a unrepresentative results. it is stated by the auth...
^^^^^^^
Line 21, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...unrepresentative results. it is stated by the author that fitness le...
^^
Line 21, column 135, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...of computer ownership are also highest. however, the author groundlessly assume that th...
^^^^^^^
Line 21, column 199, Rule ID: THERE_RE_MANY[3]
Message: Possible agreement error. Did you mean 'factors'?
Suggestion: factors
...ndlessly assume that there are no other factor that contribute to the high level of fi...
^^^^^^
Line 21, column 268, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
... high level of fitness in those places. it is possible that there are a lot of par...
^^
Line 21, column 407, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...r the citizens to workout and exercise. it is also possible that citizens living i...
^^
Line 31, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
...evels are above average. there is also a hidden assumption that declin...
^^^^^
Line 31, column 100, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Even
...s associated with low level of fitness. even if the usage of computer will not influ...
^^^^
Line 31, column 262, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...lationship between economy and fitness. it is possible the decline in fitness leve...
^^
Line 31, column 359, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Also
... economy is poor is only a coincidence. also, the author unreasonably assume that th...
^^^^
Line 31, column 636, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Even
...gs such as travel, shopping on clothes. even if the economy is actually going throug...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, however, if, may, so, thus, whereas, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 32.0 19.6327345309 163% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 12.9520958084 31% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 20.0 13.6137724551 147% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 28.8173652695 108% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 55.5748502994 86% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2329.0 2260.96107784 103% => OK
No of words: 438.0 441.139720559 99% => OK
Chars per words: 5.31735159817 5.12650576532 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.57476223824 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.82873026905 2.78398813304 102% => OK
Unique words: 196.0 204.123752495 96% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.447488584475 0.468620217663 95% => OK
syllable_count: 741.6 705.55239521 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.76447105788 137% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.421732539 57.8364921388 79% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.904761905 119.503703932 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.8571428571 23.324526521 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.09523809524 5.70786347227 54% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 21.0 5.25449101796 400% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.161938684192 0.218282227539 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0516459448237 0.0743258471296 69% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.100465015821 0.0701772020484 143% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0945872683156 0.128457276422 74% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.122320885405 0.0628817314937 195% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.1 14.3799401198 98% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 48.3550499002 88% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.197005988 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.58 12.5979740519 108% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.77 8.32208582834 105% => OK
difficult_words: 115.0 98.500998004 117% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.