The following appeared in a health magazine published in Corpora.
"Medical experts say that only one-quarter of Corpora's citizens meet the current standards for adequate physical fitness, even though twenty years ago, one-half of all of Corpora's citizens met the standards as then defined. But these experts are mistaken when they suggest that spending too much time using computers has caused a decline in fitness. Since overall fitness levels are highest in regions of Corpora where levels of computer ownership are also highest, it is clear that using computers has not made citizens less physically fit. Instead, as shown by this year's unusually low expenditures on fitness-related products and services, the recent decline in the economy is most likely the cause, and fitness levels will improve when the economy does."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
The study examined that there is a decline in the level of physical fitness in Corpora citizens compared to twenty years ago and this is attributed due to the reduction in economy. Stated in this way the argument fails to mention several key factors, on the basis of which it could be evaluated. The conclusion relies on assumptions which are not concrete. Therefore, the argument is rather weak, unconvincing and have several flaws.
First of all, medical experts have collected and analysed the data that the level of physical fitness is one quarter in that particular year compared to twenty years ago. There is no evidence that who these medical experts are? Does they possess equal level of qualifications to identify the level of physical fitness? Homogeneity in level of expertise is very important to determine the groups having problem with fitness. Secondly, the experts who have collected the data and assessed them twenty years ago, do the same or similar level of qualified experts have analysed the data is not mentioned.
Additionally, the experts made a strong correlation between the duration of computer use and fitness level. And again, this hypothesis was negated by the fact that computer ownership is highest among Corpora’s and the fitness level compared to other regions. No concluding evidences exist on this argument. It is still unknown if non computer users have low physical fitness level or not. Doing a proper research by taking both computer and non computer users and examining their fitness may help in finding the association between computer uses and fitness level.
Moreover, a stronger relationship was noticed between economy and the fitness substantiating the fact that economical improvement will help in increase in number of buyer in fitness related products and thus will enhance the fitness. Although, the citizens have spent least amount on fitness related products, no clear evidence exist corroborating the fact that whether decline in economy is really a potential factor for this? It may so happen that the citizens do not rely on fitness related products for improving their fitness and they believe on alternative methods such as yoga, morning walk to be healthy. So no clear relation exist on increase economy will have a positive impact on fitness.
In summary, the argument is flawed and unconvincing. It could be considerably strengthened if the author mentioned the relevant facts. In order to understand the current situation, a detailed analysis of factors and summon of knowledge is required.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 412 350
No. of Characters: 2102 1500
No. of Different Words: 198 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.505 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.102 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.698 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 165 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 145 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 86 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.619 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.925 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.524 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.306 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.548 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.096 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...unconvincing and have several flaws. First of all, medical experts have colle...
^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 209, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...years ago. There is no evidence that who these medical experts are? Does they po...
^^
Line 3, column 239, Rule ID: DOES_YOU[1]
Message: Did you mean 'do'? 'does' is only used for the third person singular (he/she/it).
Suggestion: Do
...e that who these medical experts are? Does they possess equal level of qualificati...
^^^^
Line 3, column 488, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... experts who have collected the data and assessed them twenty years ago, do the s...
^^
Line 3, column 536, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ed them twenty years ago, do the same or similar level of qualified experts have ...
^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... analysed the data is not mentioned. Additionally, the experts made a strong ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 313, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s. No concluding evidences exist on this argument. It is still unknown if non com...
^^^
Line 5, column 414, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[3]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'proper research'.
Suggestion: proper research
...ow physical fitness level or not. Doing a proper research by taking both computer and non compute...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...een computer uses and fitness level. Moreover, a stronger relationship was no...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 186, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...l help in increase in number of buyer in fitness related products and thus will e...
^^^
Line 7, column 277, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[3]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'spent the least'.
Suggestion: spent the least
...he fitness. Although, the citizens have spent least amount on fitness related products, no ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 395, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...orating the fact that whether decline in economy is really a potential factor for...
^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...l have a positive impact on fitness. In summary, the argument is flawed and u...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, may, moreover, really, second, secondly, so, still, then, therefore, thus, in summary, such as, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.9520958084 54% => OK
Conjunction : 17.0 11.1786427146 152% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 23.0 28.8173652695 80% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 55.5748502994 88% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 16.3942115768 91% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2160.0 2260.96107784 96% => OK
No of words: 412.0 441.139720559 93% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.2427184466 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.50530610838 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.78679253796 2.78398813304 100% => OK
Unique words: 205.0 204.123752495 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.497572815534 0.468620217663 106% => OK
syllable_count: 689.4 705.55239521 98% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 54.0141075046 57.8364921388 93% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.857142857 119.503703932 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.619047619 23.324526521 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.90476190476 5.70786347227 103% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 13.0 5.25449101796 247% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.20758483034 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.128259546078 0.218282227539 59% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0389950897471 0.0743258471296 52% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0575085356416 0.0701772020484 82% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0677557714285 0.128457276422 53% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0468965362405 0.0628817314937 75% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 14.3799401198 91% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 43.73 48.3550499002 90% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.11 12.5979740519 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.76 8.32208582834 105% => OK
difficult_words: 109.0 98.500998004 111% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.