The following appeared in a letter to the editor of the Balmer Island Gazette.
"On Balmer Island, where mopeds serve as a popular form of transportation, the population increases to 100,000 during the summer months. To reduce the number of accidents involving mopeds and pedestrians, the town council of Balmer Island should limit the number of mopeds rented by the island's moped rental companies from 50 per day to 25 per day during the summer season. By limiting the number of rentals, the town council will attain the 50 percent annual reduction in moped accidents that was achieved last year on the neighboring island of Seaville, when Seaville's town council enforced similar limits on moped rentals."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The author proposes that the town council of balmer island must limit the number of rental mopeds available during the summer in order to reduce the number of accidents involving passengers and moped. But to ascertain whether these arguments will likely have the proposed result, some questions need to be answered.
Firstly, are the conditions of the neighbouring island of seaville that the author has mentioned comparable to balmer’s? For if the conditions on both the islands are not similar, the proposed fact, in no manner, helps in strengthening the argument . It could be the case that mopeds do not serve as a primary form of transportation in seaville as they do in balmer, which will directly imply that decreasing the number of moped rentals was not the only reason that resulted in lower number of accidents on seaville island the previous year .Also, does the seaville island gets the same hike in the population during the summer like the balmer? What exactly was the reason behind limiting the number of moped rentals on seaville? . Unfortunately, this is something which author did not mention in his letter. Moreover, the author also didn’t explain how the last year’s accident data from the Seville island helps him to reach to his proposed argument.
Secondly, since mopeds are the primary form of transport on balmer, limiting the number of rental mopeds in the peak summer season when the demand for them is relatively higher, might force people to rent other types of vehicles like cars, or other two or four wheelers. Consequently, it will exacerbate the traffic conditions on the island, for it is mentioned that the summer season is accompanied by an increase in the population to 100,000, therefore, it is likely that the roads will be flooded with cars and other rentals by the tourists during the summer, making pedestrians more susceptible to accidents. Hence, it is important to answer if the balmer’s town council has done something like this in the past, which positively helped them to mitigate the problem rather than worsening it? For if it is being done for the first time, the situation may get worse before it ever improves.
To conclude, the author’s argument could’ve been more viable if he had given a broader perspective towards the problem. Had the author presented more relevant pieces of facts to bolster his claims, his argument could’ve been much more persuasive.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 8 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 405 350
No. of Characters: 1965 1500
No. of Different Words: 204 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.486 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.852 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.516 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 153 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 95 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 70 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 39 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 31.154 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 16.774 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.692 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.352 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.582 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.152 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 249, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...ner, helps in strengthening the argument . It could be the case that mopeds do not...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, first, firstly, hence, if, may, second, secondly, so, then
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 19.6327345309 51% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 12.9520958084 69% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 11.1786427146 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 6.0 13.6137724551 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 21.0 28.8173652695 73% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 55.5748502994 74% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 16.3942115768 43% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1523.0 2260.96107784 67% => OK
No of words: 297.0 441.139720559 67% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.12794612795 5.12650576532 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.15134772569 4.56307096286 91% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.71448302431 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 173.0 204.123752495 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.582491582492 0.468620217663 124% => OK
syllable_count: 458.1 705.55239521 65% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 4.0 8.76447105788 46% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 12.0 19.7664670659 61% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 46.4586883395 57.8364921388 80% => OK
Chars per sentence: 126.916666667 119.503703932 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.75 23.324526521 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.41666666667 5.70786347227 112% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 8.20758483034 37% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.237973943578 0.218282227539 109% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.085842959428 0.0743258471296 115% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.085892900056 0.0701772020484 122% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.141929269342 0.128457276422 110% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.085554533418 0.0628817314937 136% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 14.3799401198 105% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 55.58 48.3550499002 115% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.77 12.5979740519 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.76 8.32208582834 105% => OK
difficult_words: 74.0 98.500998004 75% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.