The author suggests that the Grandview Symphony will not need any financial support from the city government anymore because the new famous conductor can attract a lot more audiences and private funds than before. However, this argument still lacks some evidences in order to evaluate its claims.
First of all, the argument does not mention the amount of money that the symphony profits from its performance after hiring the new conductor. Although, the high performance conductor can dramatically increase the number of audiences and double private contributions, there is still no evidence that the income of the symphony can cover all of its expenses for arranging their events. The cost of auditorium, musical instrument, lighting system, and especially high quality conductor can be incredibly high and, without government funding, the symphony can be bankrupt.
Secondly, the author states that the symphony can earn more money by raising their ticket prices. However, the increased ticket prices can definitely decrease the number of audiences. Accordingly, the number of audiences may gradually reduce and the total ticket sale will even be lower than the sale at the current ticket price. Therefore, there should be a survey to find the opinion of the audiences on the current ticket prices. If the most of audiences think that they can afford more expensive ticket for the performance, the author’ claim may be reasonable. In the other hand, if the audiences do not agree with the increased price, the statement can be flawed.
Last but not least, the argument implies that the well-known conductor can attract high-profile guest musicians to the symphony’ performance. This claim may be convincing by referring to the previous performance’s records that have a number of high-profile guest musicians but no one can guarantee that this conductor will be able to attract the same number of fabulous guest musicians in the future. These guest musicians may prefer to change their performing venues to the different places around the world. Subsequently, there may be not as much guest musicians in the future as the number predicted by the author and the symphony will not be able to keep the number of its audiences to be as much as the current audiences.
All in all, the argument still needs a lot of evidences in order to prove that the symphony does not need the government support.
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Essay evaluation report
argument 1 -- not exactly. We don't ask extra info like 'the amount of money that the symphony profits from its performance'. We get info from prompts like: 'private contributions to the symphony have doubled'
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- not OK
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Let's analyze the structure of the statement and argue accordingly:
condition 1:
Since then, private contributions to the symphony have doubled //maybe it still can't cover the expenses
condition 2:
and attendance at the symphony's concerts-in-the-park series has reached new highs. //maybe it is free in tickets
condition 3:
Now that the Grandview Symphony is an established success, it can raise ticket prices. //your argument 2
conclusion:
Increased revenue from larger audiences and higher ticket prices will enable the symphony to succeed without funding from the city government. //a lot of factors will affect the revenue
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 9 15
No. of Words: 320 350
No. of Characters: 1631 1500
No. of Different Words: 161 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.229 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.097 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.772 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 121 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 95 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 71 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 39 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 35.556 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 19.557 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.889 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.448 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.733 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.077 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 441, Rule ID: MOST_SOME_OF_NNS[1]
Message: After 'most of', you should use 'the' ('most of the audiences') or simply say ''most audiences''.
Suggestion: most of the audiences; most audiences
...es on the current ticket prices. If the most of audiences think that they can afford more expensi...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 738, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...to be as much as the current audiences. All in all, the argument still needs a l...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 131, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...y does not need the government support.
^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['accordingly', 'but', 'first', 'however', 'if', 'may', 'second', 'secondly', 'so', 'still', 'therefore', 'well', 'first of all']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.254587155963 0.25644967241 99% => OK
Verbs: 0.116972477064 0.15541462614 75% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0894495412844 0.0836205057962 107% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0665137614679 0.0520304965353 128% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0183486238532 0.0272364105082 67% => OK
Prepositions: 0.112385321101 0.125424944231 90% => OK
Participles: 0.0206422018349 0.0416121511921 50% => Some participles wanted.
Conjunctions: 2.83121475287 2.79052419416 101% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0229357798165 0.026700313972 86% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.001811407834 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.146788990826 0.113004496875 130% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0481651376147 0.0255425247493 189% => Less modal verbs wanted (like 'must , shall , will , should , would , can , could , may , and might').
WH_determiners: 0.00229357798165 0.0127820249294 18% => Some subClauses wanted starting by 'Which, Who, What, Whom, Whose.....'
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2430.0 2731.13054187 89% => OK
No of words: 391.0 446.07635468 88% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 6.21483375959 6.12365571057 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.44676510885 4.57801047555 97% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.388746803069 0.378187486979 103% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.294117647059 0.287650121315 102% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.222506393862 0.208842608468 107% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.161125319693 0.135150697306 119% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83121475287 2.79052419416 101% => OK
Unique words: 176.0 207.018472906 85% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.450127877238 0.469332199767 96% => OK
Word variations: 47.5528812304 52.1807786196 91% => OK
How many sentences: 16.0 20.039408867 80% => OK
Sentence length: 24.4375 23.2022227129 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 55.3709084267 57.7814097925 96% => OK
Chars per sentence: 151.875 141.986410481 107% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.4375 23.2022227129 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.8125 0.724660767414 112% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.14285714286 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 3.58251231527 84% => OK
Readability: 53.8492647059 51.9672348444 104% => OK
Elegance: 1.92045454545 1.8405768891 104% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.553722156748 0.441005458295 126% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.197624540448 0.135418324435 146% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0925422477866 0.0829849096947 112% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.709069119931 0.58762219726 121% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.135681571666 0.147661913831 92% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.295764995125 0.193483328276 153% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0895876667248 0.0970749176394 92% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.465836082263 0.42659136922 109% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0961637962106 0.0774707102158 124% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.400118027279 0.312017818177 128% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0451964008875 0.0698173142475 65% => The ideas may be duplicated in paragraphs.
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 9.0 8.33743842365 108% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.87684729064 44% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.82512315271 83% => OK
Positive topic words: 9.0 6.46551724138 139% => OK
Negative topic words: 3.0 5.36822660099 56% => OK
Neutral topic words: 4.0 2.82389162562 142% => OK
Total topic words: 16.0 14.657635468 109% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 62.5 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.75 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.