The following appeared in a memo from the director of student housing at Buckingham College.
"To serve the housing needs of our students, Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories. Buckingham's enrollment is growing and, based on current trends, will double over the next 50 years, thus making existing dormitory space inadequate. Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing. Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The director of student housing at Buckingham College claims that there is need of new dormitories. and this would further make prospective students to enroll at Buckingham college. However, the argument is based on inadequately supported assumptions and is rather unconvincing given the obvious flaws in the argument.
Firstly, there is no data provided on the growing number of enrollment at the Buckingham and no evidence is provided on the basis the author has assumed that as per the current trends, the enrollment will be get double over the next 50 years. there could be change in trends over the years. without any data it would be erroneous conclusion.
Secondly, it is assumed that due to the current surge in average rent for apartments in the town, the studenst will find it difficult to afford off-campus housing. however, the average rent could also decline over the next years, as it depends on economy and other factors of the country as well as the town. Also, the author has not provided the data how cheap the rent of the dormitories would be compared to the average rent in the town. So, without such figures or data it would be unconvincing to assume this.
lastly, the author assumes that the attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham college, but author fails to acknowledge the other factors that the students might look into before enrolling like the course fee, job opportunities near the college, etc. hence it can not be concluded that the new dormitories would be the only factor in proliferate the enrollements at the college.
In summary, the given argument falls short on many aspects. the argument did start with sound premise, however it lacked necessary data to strengthen the argument. For instance, if the author would have included the raw data how the dormitories would be cheaper than the apartments in the town. also, the current trend data for the increase in enrollment at the college would have helped the author drive home his point in far more convincing manner and establish a position with a shred of doubt. But, in the absence of these, the argument remains flawed.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 10 15
No. of Words: 365 350
No. of Characters: 1764 1500
No. of Different Words: 171 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.371 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.833 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.597 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 123 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 97 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 57 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 36 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 36.5 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 20.694 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.9 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.412 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.707 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.075 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 101, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: And
... that there is need of new dormitories. and this would further make prospective stu...
^^^
Line 3, column 244, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
...l be get double over the next 50 years. there could be change in trends over the year...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 292, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Without
...uld be change in trends over the years. without any data it would be erroneous conclusi...
^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 165, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: However
...difficult to afford off-campus housing. however, the average rent could also decline ov...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Lastly
...uld be unconvincing to assume this. lastly, the author assumes that the attractive...
^^^^^^
Line 9, column 61, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
...n argument falls short on many aspects. the argument did start with sound premise, ...
^^^
Line 9, column 193, Rule ID: IF_WOULD_HAVE_VBN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'had included'?
Suggestion: had included
...e argument. For instance, if the author would have included the raw data how the dormitories would ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 296, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Also
...heaper than the apartments in the town. also, the current trend data for the increas...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, hence, however, if, lastly, look, second, secondly, so, then, well, for instance, in summary, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.6327345309 71% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 11.1786427146 63% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 13.6137724551 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 28.8173652695 59% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 55.5748502994 88% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1815.0 2260.96107784 80% => OK
No of words: 365.0 441.139720559 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.97260273973 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.37092360658 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.65461497619 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 176.0 204.123752495 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.482191780822 0.468620217663 103% => OK
syllable_count: 560.7 705.55239521 79% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 22.8473053892 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 68.2829448225 57.8364921388 118% => OK
Chars per sentence: 106.764705882 119.503703932 89% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.4705882353 23.324526521 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.70588235294 5.70786347227 135% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.25449101796 152% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 8.20758483034 37% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 6.88822355289 102% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.216359368728 0.218282227539 99% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0766451807829 0.0743258471296 103% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.12729839472 0.0701772020484 181% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.145176443771 0.128457276422 113% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.125745630932 0.0628817314937 200% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.7 14.3799401198 88% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 48.3550499002 121% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.197005988 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.55 12.5979740519 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.05 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 78.0 98.500998004 79% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 10.5 12.3882235529 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 11.1389221557 93% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.