The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore a chain of video rental stores In order to reverse the recent decline in our profits we must reduce operating expenses at Movies Galore s ten video rental stores Since we are famous fo

Essay topics:

The following appeared in a memorandum from the owner of Movies Galore, a chain of
video rental stores.
“In order to reverse the recent decline in our profits, we must reduce operating expenses at
Movies Galore’s ten video rental stores. Since we are famous for our special bargains, raising
our rental prices is not a viable way to improve profits. Last month our store in downtown
Marston significantly decreased its operating expenses by closing at 6:00 P.M. rather than
9:00 P.M. and by reducing its stock by eliminating all movies released more than five years
ago. Therefore, in order to increase profits without jeopardizing our reputation for offering
great movies at low prices, we recommend implementing similar changes in our other nine
Movies Galore stores.”

The above prompt gives an insight of the solution that the owner of Movies Galore rental stores wishes to implement in an attempt to reverse the decline in their profits.The owner wants to reverse the declining profits by reducing the operating expenses at the video rental stores which he assumes to be the primary source of their declining profits.In order to apply the solution to all the nine stores he assumes a lot of things based on the results it got by implementing in one of the stores.Let us consider the assumptions one by one.

Firstly, the owner assumes that the decline in the profit is maybe due to the operating expenses of the rental store and thus he reduced the expenses in the downtown rental store.However, it is possible that despite the reduction in the expenses the total profit may not have changed. It is not known by how much the operating expenses reduced and how it affected the net profit as closing the rental store early will result in less customers thus reducing the money flow.

Secondly, the owner relies on the results it got in one rental store. He assumes that all the rental stores will be equally affected by changing the timing . It is possible that the inflow of the customers may be different from 6 PM to 9 PM and all the nine rental stores may experience rush at this time which might boost the store' money flow. Also, it is possible that all the rental stores are located at different locations where the amount of people visiting might be different between 6 PM and 9PM.

Lastly, the owner assumes that people do not visit to watch movies older than 5 years. However, it is possible that people are mostly busy in their day to day life that they do not get sufficient time to watch movies in the theatre and hence,they might prefer to watch these movies in their own free time .Also, it is possible that many people wish to watch their movies repeatedly which are not available in the theatre and hence, they visit video rental stores.The owner mentions about the special bargains its store offers, hence, it is possible that people would want to visit time and again and watch their favorite movies.If the movies are not available then it would create a negative impression on the customer and it is possible that he would not visit again.

Hence , the assumptions that owner makes do not seem valid and furhter details about all the stores and evidence is required to determine the reason for declining profits.

Votes
Average: 7 (2 votes)
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Essay Categories

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 425, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun customers is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...g the rental store early will result in less customers thus reducing the money flow ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 468, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s customers thus reducing the money flow Secondly the owner relies on the results...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 154, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... equally affected by changing the timing It is possible that the inflow of the cu...
^^
Line 5, column 230, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...the customers may be different from 6 PM to 9 PM and all the nine rental stores m...
^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...ssible that he would not visit again Hence the assumptions that owner makes do no...
^^^^^
Line 9, column 6, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e that he would not visit again Hence the assumptions that owner makes do not ...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, firstly, hence, however, if, lastly, may, second, secondly, so, then, thus

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 13.6137724551 125% => OK
Pronoun: 42.0 28.8173652695 146% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 52.0 55.5748502994 94% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 16.3942115768 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2009.0 2260.96107784 89% => OK
No of words: 435.0 441.139720559 99% => OK
Chars per words: 4.6183908046 5.12650576532 90% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.56690854021 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.30334732612 2.78398813304 83% => OK
Unique words: 171.0 204.123752495 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.393103448276 0.468620217663 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 641.7 705.55239521 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 0.0 4.96107784431 0% => OK
Article: 1.0 8.76447105788 11% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 0.0 4.22255489022 0% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 1.0 19.7664670659 5% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 435.0 22.8473053892 1904% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 0.0 57.8364921388 0% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 2009.0 119.503703932 1681% => Less chars_per_sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 435.0 23.324526521 1865% => Less words per sentence wanted.
Discourse Markers: 87.0 5.70786347227 1524% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 1.0 8.20758483034 12% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 6.88822355289 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.67664670659 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.322632877005 0.218282227539 148% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.322632877005 0.0743258471296 434% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0 0.0701772020484 0% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.18564484111 0.128457276422 145% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.079855968717 0.0628817314937 127% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 217.8 14.3799401198 1515% => Automated_readability_index is high.
flesch_reading_ease: -361.59 48.3550499002 -748% => Flesch_reading_ease is low.
smog_index: 0.0 7.1628742515 0% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 171.8 12.197005988 1409% => Flesch kincaid grade is high.
coleman_liau_index: 11.0 12.5979740519 87% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 27.93 8.32208582834 336% => Dale chall readability score is high.
difficult_words: 75.0 98.500998004 76% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 53.0 12.3882235529 428% => Linsear_write_formula is high.
gunning_fog: 176.0 11.1389221557 1580% => Gunning_fog is high.
text_standard: 28.0 11.9071856287 235% => The average readability is very high. Good job!
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 9 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 12 15
No. of Words: 442 350
No. of Characters: 1993 1500
No. of Different Words: 172 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.585 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.509 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.219 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 138 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 88 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 54 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 24 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 36.833 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 26.586 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.399 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.682 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.21 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5