The following appeared on the Mozart School of Music Web site.
"The Mozart School of Music should be the first choice for parents considering enrolling their child in music lessons. First of all, the Mozart School welcomes youngsters at all ability and age levels; there is no audition to attend the school. Second, the school offers instruction in nearly all musical instruments as well a wide range of styles and genres from classical to rock. Third, the faculty includes some of the most distinguished musicians in the area. Finally, many Mozart graduates have gone on to become well-known and highly paid professional musicians."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
Though the advantages of attending this school are clearly asserted, the information that would further bolster their argument is noticeably omitted. There are several examples that the school provides but does not offer enough detail to effectively convince a potential customer to admit their children.
It is clear that there is a explicit four-prong attempt at persuasion, with the school covering all potential concerns a prospective parent would have. However, they do not go into detail. They claim that they teach “nearly” all musical instruments. This could read as a disadvantage. They do not expand on which instruments they teach. The kind and type of instruments that a music school teaches is an intrinsic part of an institution such as this.
Later in the paragraph, school again does not provide vital information that could help identify the prestige of the school. Although the school shows that they have a legacy of producing professional musicians, they failed to provide the names any of them. This omission would be disadvantageous as recognition of those names may further prove the effectiveness of the school. Without examples, parents may assume the school is making empty claims. They run into this problem earlier, as well, with their claim that the faculty includes many distinguished musicians. The school would achieve greater customer recognition if they advertised their results, in this case, their graduates' prestige and fame.
Additionally, by stating that there is no audition for the school, parents may assume that this school has lower standards than a school that requires an audition. There is some dissonance between the claim that the school should be parents “first choice” and the claim that they do not require an audition. Merit based institutions are generally held in higher regard than non-Merit based institutions, potentially discouraging parents.
This argument is in need of further details and proof of its legacy, such as the names of successful graduates, and the amount of time it has been running. With these additions, it could persuade parents to send their children specifically to this institution.
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- Universities should require every student to take a variety of courses outside the student's field of study.Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position 75
- The following appeared on the Mozart School of Music Web site."The Mozart School of Music should be the first choice for parents considering enrolling their child in music lessons. First of all, the Mozart School welcomes youngsters at all ability and age 47
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 342 350
No. of Characters: 1779 1500
No. of Different Words: 176 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.3 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.202 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.752 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 131 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 98 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 68 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.704 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.526 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.311 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.539 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.071 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 27, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
... children. It is clear that there is a explicit four-prong attempt at persuasi...
^
Line 7, column 213, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s some dissonance between the claim that the school should be parents 'first...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, may, so, well, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 14.0 19.6327345309 71% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.9520958084 93% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 45.0 28.8173652695 156% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 31.0 55.5748502994 56% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 12.0 16.3942115768 73% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1854.0 2260.96107784 82% => OK
No of words: 342.0 441.139720559 78% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.42105263158 5.12650576532 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.30037696126 4.56307096286 94% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.96869316123 2.78398813304 107% => OK
Unique words: 186.0 204.123752495 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.543859649123 0.468620217663 116% => OK
syllable_count: 542.7 705.55239521 77% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 4.96107784431 222% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.22255489022 142% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 40.6403726508 57.8364921388 70% => OK
Chars per sentence: 97.5789473684 119.503703932 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.0 23.324526521 77% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.47368421053 5.70786347227 43% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.88822355289 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.237128616382 0.218282227539 109% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0753243388956 0.0743258471296 101% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0619262338209 0.0701772020484 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.127324551931 0.128457276422 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0595953595896 0.0628817314937 95% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.1 14.3799401198 91% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 53.21 48.3550499002 110% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 12.197005988 84% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.86 12.5979740519 110% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.05 8.32208582834 109% => OK
difficult_words: 98.0 98.500998004 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 12.3882235529 57% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.9071856287 84% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 62.5 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.75 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.