The following appeared as an opinion-editorial in a local newspaper:
In the last 10 years, the number of patrons to the local library has decreased by a factor of 5, while during that time the number of purchases of electronic books has increased by a factor of 10. The director of the library believes that the cause of the decrease in patrons is due to the library not advertising as effectively as do online merchants that sell electronic books. Therefore, the library should double the amount of money that it spends on advertising, so that more patrons will frequent the library.
It appeared as an opinion-editorial in a local newspaper that in last 10 years the number of patrons to the local library have substantially decreased by a factor of 5 while, the number of electronic books purchases have increased by a factor of 10. So, the director of the library believes that the cause for the decrease in patrons is due to online merchants are effectively advertising. Additionally, he asserts that the library should double the amount they spend on advertising which would lead more patrons to frequently visit library. Perhaps, this argument ultimately fails as it suffers from several critical fallacies and sounds unconvincing and weak.
Firstly, a major lacuna in the argument is the unfair comparison of the local library and the purchase of electronic books. And, as the arguer have asserted that in the last 10 years the number of patrons has decreased and purchasing of electronic book have gone up by a factor of 10. But, the reason which the arguer claim is due to proper advertising done by the electronic book seller. Moreover, it is also possible that the electronic book seller might be giving huge amount of sale on the purchase of electronic book and might also provide an offline access to those files which could be easily accessed by the reader whenever he want by using his or her mobile. The reason for the substantial decrease of visit of patrons to the library could also be due to they are not interested anymore in visiting library and reading books there, the other reason could also be that the library charges more amount to the patron than the purchase of electronic books. However, the arguer claim that the decrease in patrons to local library is due to the effectiveness of advertising which is done by the electronic book seller. So, to overcome this the arguer tells that the local library should double the amount which they spend on advertising to attract the patrons. But, the argument asserted is weak and could be not true as it is possible that even after increasing their money for the advertisement the local library may not get frequent patrons and may incur huge loss due to it. Additionally, it is also possible that the patrons are no more interested in going to local library and even if they do visit it, it doesn't mean that they would become permanent visitor. However, the arguer could have mentioned about various offers which they would provide to the frequent patrons who purchase books and would probably successful.
So, the recommendation done by the arguer is weak and does not convince the reader and should provide enough evidence and offers to attract the patrons.
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| 2016-10-08 | sandeep.daiya45@gmail.com | 54 | view |
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- The following appeared as an opinion-editorial in a local newspaper:In the last 10 years, the number of patrons to the local library has decreased by a factor of 5, while during that time the number of purchases of electronic books has increased by a fact 50
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 663, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...acies and sounds unconvincing and weak. Firstly, a major lacuna in the argument ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 546, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[3]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'offline access'.
Suggestion: offline access
... electronic book and might also provide an offline access to those files which could be easily ac...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 636, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'he' must be used with a third-person verb: 'wants'.
Suggestion: wants
...sily accessed by the reader whenever he want by using his or her mobile. The reason ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 1616, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...ibrary and even if they do visit it, it doesnt mean that they would become permanent v...
^^^^^^
Discourse Markers used:
['also', 'but', 'first', 'firstly', 'however', 'if', 'may', 'moreover', 'so', 'while']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.202898550725 0.25644967241 79% => OK
Verbs: 0.151138716356 0.15541462614 97% => OK
Adjectives: 0.105590062112 0.0836205057962 126% => OK
Adverbs: 0.064182194617 0.0520304965353 123% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0393374741201 0.0272364105082 144% => Less pronouns wanted. Try not to use 'you, I, they, he...' as the subject of a sentence
Prepositions: 0.12215320911 0.125424944231 97% => OK
Participles: 0.0351966873706 0.0416121511921 85% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.67281818394 2.79052419416 96% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0331262939959 0.026700313972 124% => OK
Particles: 0.00207039337474 0.001811407834 114% => OK
Determiners: 0.120082815735 0.113004496875 106% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0331262939959 0.0255425247493 130% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0165631469979 0.0127820249294 130% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2654.0 2731.13054187 97% => OK
No of words: 452.0 446.07635468 101% => OK
Chars per words: 5.87168141593 6.12365571057 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.61088837703 4.57801047555 101% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.349557522124 0.378187486979 92% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.25 0.287650121315 87% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.170353982301 0.208842608468 82% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.0907079646018 0.135150697306 67% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.67281818394 2.79052419416 96% => OK
Unique words: 174.0 207.018472906 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.384955752212 0.469332199767 82% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 42.1365786862 52.1807786196 81% => OK
How many sentences: 15.0 20.039408867 75% => OK
Sentence length: 30.1333333333 23.2022227129 130% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.0295953542 57.7814097925 97% => OK
Chars per sentence: 176.933333333 141.986410481 125% => OK
Words per sentence: 30.1333333333 23.2022227129 130% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.666666666667 0.724660767414 92% => OK
Paragraphs: 3.0 5.14285714286 58% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 4.0 3.58251231527 112% => OK
Readability: 55.1333333333 51.9672348444 106% => OK
Elegance: 1.41463414634 1.8405768891 77% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.636612386019 0.441005458295 144% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.214320685909 0.135418324435 158% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.099094115557 0.0829849096947 119% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.623750704933 0.58762219726 106% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.167202246569 0.147661913831 113% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.330835114158 0.193483328276 171% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.192588239236 0.0970749176394 198% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.63809158991 0.42659136922 150% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0939882264763 0.0774707102158 121% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.499268020877 0.312017818177 160% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.183789964022 0.0698173142475 263% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.33743842365 60% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.87684729064 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.82512315271 21% => More neutral sentences wanted.
Positive topic words: 4.0 6.46551724138 62% => OK
Negative topic words: 9.0 5.36822660099 168% => OK
Neutral topic words: 1.0 2.82389162562 35% => OK
Total topic words: 14.0 14.657635468 96% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
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Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.