Homes in the northeastern United States, where winters are typically cold, have traditionally used oil as their major fuel for heating. Last year that region experienced 90 days with below-average temperatures, and climate forecasters at Waymarsh University predict that this weather pattern will continue for several more years. Furthermore, many new homes have been built in this region during the past year. Because of these developments, we predict an increased demand for heating oil and recommend investment in Consolidated Industries, one of whose major business operations is the retail sale of home heating oil
In this recommendation, the author advices the client to invest in Consolidate Industries, one of whos major business operation is retail sail of home heating oil, as local weather forecaster predict below-average temperature for several more years. However, the recommendation suffers from several flaws, and is therefore unwise and unconvincing as it stands, albeit it may appear plausible at cursory glance.
To begin with, the author unjustifiably assumes people now still use oil as their major fuel for heating homes during winters. to support this he states traditionally oil is used as a major fuel for heating and further assumes the new homes constructed now would use the same technique to heat up their houses. However, nowadays due the advancement of technology people have and access to various different electrical machines used to heat up the houses, like the heaters, which are more convenient and cheaper in operation. Perhaps, people use such devices to heat their houses. The author fails to provide evidence to support this claim that oils are still being used to heat up houses.
In addition to this, the author unfairly assumes that the information stated by local forecasters is true. He provides no evidence or statistical data to support this assumption. He states that last year northeastern United States experienced below average temperature and based on this information the local forecasters predict similar weather pattern for several years. How can the forecasters predict information for several years based on 20 days? Also, there are no geographic evidences or statistical reports presented by the author to support the same.
Lastly, the author assumes that investing in Consolidate Industries would benefit the client. Even if we consider that the people still use heating oils as their major fuel but, the word 'major' does not imply that heating oil is the only fuel used. Furthermore, since traditionally oil is being used as a fuel for heating, there maybe more different companies producing and selling such heating oils, these companies maybe locals and people might be supporting locals than Consolidate Industry because local brand are usually cheaper than non-locals. However, does Consolidate Industry sell their oil in Northeastern United States? If no then there in no point in investing in the same.
To sum up, the author seems hurried to jump to the conclusion based on a series of problematic assumptions. To strengthen the argument, further investigation and analysis are needed, as the author is not able to justify his stand and does not present us with relevant support to his stand.
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 11 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 422 350
No. of Characters: 2173 1500
No. of Different Words: 199 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.532 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.149 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.794 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 162 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 122 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 70 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 56 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.444 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.307 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.321 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.569 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.143 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 99, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: who's
...nvest in Consolidate Industries, one of whos major business operation is retail sail...
^^^^
Line 3, column 128, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: To
... fuel for heating homes during winters. to support this he states traditionally oi...
^^
Line 7, column 173, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ill use heating oils as their major fuel but, the word major does not imply that ...
^^
Line 7, column 633, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “If” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...heir oil in Northeastern United States? If no then there in no point in investing ...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, furthermore, however, if, lastly, may, so, still, then, therefore, in addition, to begin with, to sum up
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 19.6327345309 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 5.0 12.9520958084 39% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 13.6137724551 51% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 27.0 28.8173652695 94% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 55.5748502994 88% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2230.0 2260.96107784 99% => OK
No of words: 422.0 441.139720559 96% => OK
Chars per words: 5.28436018957 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.53239876712 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.84695300171 2.78398813304 102% => OK
Unique words: 208.0 204.123752495 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.492890995261 0.468620217663 105% => OK
syllable_count: 699.3 705.55239521 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.22255489022 189% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 66.2948588523 57.8364921388 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 117.368421053 119.503703932 98% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.2105263158 23.324526521 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.05263157895 5.70786347227 106% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.31541044084 0.218282227539 144% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0984927480702 0.0743258471296 133% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0927154902284 0.0701772020484 132% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.154997666285 0.128457276422 121% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0762587138025 0.0628817314937 121% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.5 14.3799401198 101% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 40.69 48.3550499002 84% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.1 12.197005988 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.34 12.5979740519 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.43 8.32208582834 101% => OK
difficult_words: 99.0 98.500998004 101% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 12.3882235529 121% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.9071856287 126% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.