"Last year the number of students who enrolled in online degree programs offered by nearby Omni University increased by 50 percent. During the same year, Omni showed a significant decrease from prior years in expenditures for dormitory and classroom

Essay topics:

"Last year the number of students who enrolled in online degree programs offered by nearby Omni University increased by 50 percent. During the same year, Omni showed a significant decrease from prior years in expenditures for dormitory and classroom space, most likely because online instruction takes place via the Internet. In contrast, over the past three years, enrollment at Humana University has failed to grow and the cost of maintaining buildings has increased. Thus, to increase enrollment and solve the problem of budget deficits at Humana University, we should initiate and actively promote online degree programs like those at Omni."

Author in the above argument states that to increase the enrollment of students as well as solve the problem of budget deficits in Humana University, it should initiate and actively promote online degree programs like other universities such as Omni University. He didn’t think through before making a posist about the university,

Firstly, he has mentioned that the students has started enrolling online into Omni University. He has effectively increased overall 50% of enrolled. Thus, increasing the income and less expenditure on infrastructure as more students are enrolled online. Author suggests to open online courses for Humana University to increase the number of admissions. He made a facile suggestion as the faculty of both the universities are different. Students might have attracted to the Omni University because of the teaching methods used by the professors in the University.

Secondly, he states that since online courses will start then we will have to make less investment on the classrooms, washrooms and other facilities. Again author has undermined the possibility that the infrastructure of two universities can be different. If the Humana university will not spend to make the university a better place to study, it might end up losing all the offline students registered in the University.

Moreover, the author has outshadowed the expenses because of the salary of teachers and other staff. Teachers might be overpaid at Humana University leading to more expenditure then the income, resulting into budget deficits.

Lastly, the opening up of online degree programs involves lots of investment which he has not considered while deciding the budget. In addition, the Human University might not be as good graded as the Omni university. University placements might be less in Humana that’s why more students are not enrolling. Therefore, other should have collected these information or statistics before making any assumptions.

Hence to sum up, I totally disagree with the author’s point of view. His statement to open online degree programs just because other universities are doing, is both irrelevant and vague. He didn’t provided enough statistics to compare the financial as well as the structural as well as the educational condition of the two universities. He made a hypothetical argument to solve the real problem faced by the university.

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Average: 5.5 (3 votes)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 336, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...re making a posist about the university, Firstly, he has mentioned that the stude...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 178, Rule ID: LESS_MORE_THEN[1]
Message: Did you mean 'than'?
Suggestion: than
... University leading to more expenditure then the income, resulting into budget defic...
^^^^
Line 9, column 353, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'this information' or 'these informations'?
Suggestion: this information; these informations
... Therefore, other should have collected these information or statistics before making any assumpt...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
...stics before making any assumptions. Hence to sum up, I totally disagree with the ...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, firstly, hence, if, lastly, moreover, second, secondly, so, then, therefore, thus, well, while, in addition, such as, as well as, to sum up

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 19.6327345309 46% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.9520958084 85% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 11.1786427146 54% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 6.0 13.6137724551 44% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 19.0 28.8173652695 66% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 55.5748502994 88% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 16.3942115768 61% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2042.0 2260.96107784 90% => OK
No of words: 372.0 441.139720559 84% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.48924731183 5.12650576532 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.39173103935 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.07049030956 2.78398813304 110% => OK
Unique words: 182.0 204.123752495 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.489247311828 0.468620217663 104% => OK
syllable_count: 674.1 705.55239521 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.59920159681 113% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 4.96107784431 222% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 22.8473053892 79% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 44.7063753843 57.8364921388 77% => OK
Chars per sentence: 102.1 119.503703932 85% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.6 23.324526521 80% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.3 5.70786347227 128% => OK
Paragraphs: 6.0 5.15768463074 116% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.20758483034 61% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.170610157267 0.218282227539 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0582671383939 0.0743258471296 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0484904017234 0.0701772020484 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0969108542777 0.128457276422 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0648330687735 0.0628817314937 103% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.7 14.3799401198 95% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 36.28 48.3550499002 75% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 12.197005988 104% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.56 12.5979740519 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.9 8.32208582834 107% => OK
difficult_words: 103.0 98.500998004 105% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 12.3882235529 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 11.1389221557 83% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 21 15
No. of Words: 374 350
No. of Characters: 1963 1500
No. of Different Words: 179 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.398 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.249 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.923 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 156 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 114 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 95 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 62 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.81 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.028 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.619 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.327 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.545 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.126 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5