"To serve the housing needs of our students, Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories. Buckingham's enrollment is growing and, based on current trends, will double over the next 50 years, thus making existing dormitory space inadequate. Moreover, the average rent for an apartment in our town has risen in recent years. Consequently, students will find it increasingly difficult to afford off-campus housing. Finally, attractive new dormitories would make prospective students more likely to enroll at Buckingham."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The passage shows that based on three reasons, the school should build new dormitories. However, all three of them are lack of evidences.
First of all, the passage says that the enrollment will grow or even double than it used to according to current trends. Nonetheless, we need to know more about what the trends indicate. Did they get the information by surveying new coming students or did they just look at the number of their new students this year? If they just get the conclusion by looking at the number of their new students in recent years, there might be other causes that lead to the result. It is possible that one other school that used to be as good as Buckingham College had some scandals in recent years, so more students tend to come to Buckingham College. However, the other college have solved their problem and hired some world-famous professor so the number of students applying for Buckingham college in the next few years may decrease.
The writer also says that the average rent in the town is getting higher in recent years. There is need for evidence that tells that students who comes to the college can’t afford higher payment. It is likely that Buckingham College is a college know for its fee, and most or even all of the students studying here are rich, they won’t care about the renting fee, what they care more is the facility. Probably because of their needs, the departments in the town upgraded their furniture and add gyms and elevators in it, that is why they are charging more than they used to. On the other side, the dormitory the school is planning on won’t be able to have all the equipment according to the budget.
Last, the writer should provide evidence that tells what characteristic of the school mostly attract students. If students came to the Buckingham College because it is famous for its academic status or that graduating from the college will be easier to find a better paid job, then having a nice looking dormitory or not won’t be the main cause for students to decide whether they will pick Buckingham or not. Moreover, even though the dormitory could be the main reason why students pick Buckingham College, the school should notice that their old-fashion style dormitory may be an advantage rather than a disadvantage. Students may be more willing to live in dormitory that’ve been built for years because they’ve lived in modern building for years and like to live in old buildings.
- The best way to solve environmental problems caused by consumer generated waste is for towns and cities to impose strict limits on the amount of trash they will accept from each household Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree 66
- To serve the housing needs of our students Buckingham College should build a number of new dormitories Buckingham s enrollment is growing and based on current trends will double over the next 50 years thus making existing dormitory space inadequate Moreov 69
Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 432 350
No. of Characters: 1994 1500
No. of Different Words: 192 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.559 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.616 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.354 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 132 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 91 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 61 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 33 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25.412 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.067 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.647 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.333 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.524 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.128 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 282, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...lege know for its fee, and most or even all of the students studying here are rich, they w...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, however, if, look, may, moreover, nonetheless, so, then, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.6327345309 107% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 12.9520958084 108% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 13.6137724551 110% => OK
Pronoun: 39.0 28.8173652695 135% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 46.0 55.5748502994 83% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 16.3942115768 37% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2045.0 2260.96107784 90% => OK
No of words: 427.0 441.139720559 97% => OK
Chars per words: 4.78922716628 5.12650576532 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.54576487731 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.452676113 2.78398813304 88% => OK
Unique words: 198.0 204.123752495 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.463700234192 0.468620217663 99% => OK
syllable_count: 611.1 705.55239521 87% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.59920159681 88% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 22.8473053892 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 60.1175895015 57.8364921388 104% => OK
Chars per sentence: 120.294117647 119.503703932 101% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.1176470588 23.324526521 108% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.82352941176 5.70786347227 85% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.20758483034 73% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.262775930253 0.218282227539 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0841963049791 0.0743258471296 113% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0540954228998 0.0701772020484 77% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.153748981685 0.128457276422 120% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0671945808323 0.0628817314937 107% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.7 14.3799401198 95% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 63.02 48.3550499002 130% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.197005988 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.8 12.5979740519 86% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.43 8.32208582834 89% => OK
difficult_words: 69.0 98.500998004 70% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 12.3882235529 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.1389221557 108% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.