"Statistics gathered over the past three decades show that the death rate is higher among those who do not have jobs than among those with regular employment. Unemployment, just like heart disease and cancer, is a significant health issue. While many health care advocates promote increased government funding for medical research and public health care, it would be folly to increase government spending it doing so were to affect the nations economy adversely and ultimately cause a rise in unemployment. A healthy economy healthy citizens. Reining in government spending is, therefore, the best medicine.
The statistical data collected from past three decades interprets or depicts that the death rate is higher amongst the unemployed population. The argument also relates unemployment to be a significant health issue, which is rising day-by-day. The argument provides us with the wholesome statement drawn out from the database but fails to provide us the data set of individual field/sector in which unemployment is on a rise.
Heart diseases and cancer are the significant health issues that can be seen as the cause of death everywhere, dealing with such deadly diseases is costly and might spend up the fortune made by any middle-class family. But for past few decades there is one such health issue which cannot be treated or cured with the help of money i.e., Unemployment. Unemployment has been on the rise for the past few decades and has ruined many lives. There are several causes of unemployment such as the evolving competitive world, technological advancement, etc. Evolving world has actually snatched the peace from lives of many people and are forced to be a part of the race just because to support their family financially.
Government funding’s help institutions and commercial organizations to work efficiently, but when there are economic crisis or instability the government has to look after its citizen because of which many organizations might be deprived of the funding’s they were earlier being provided. At the time of crisis, the annual business might be affected and the company might have to layoff some of its employees so that it could sustain the loss. Economic stability is very important and only it can reduce unemployment. The argument also states that the government should increase funding for medical research, indeed medical research is important but if the nation is already under economic crisis and increasing funds for medical research can increase unemployment. Employee’s working relentlessly for their companies expect to be protected under such circumstances.
For example, XYZ country is going through economical instability and in such tedious situations the government decides to increase military funding’s, then it be difficult for the government to control such situations, A country is balanced on various fundamentals and not only some specific. For example, XVZ country is economically stable and the government decides to increase technological research for the future of the country, then in such situations the country is not affected much. In this case argument is satisfied for increasing funds for medical research.
However, while taking any decision all the factors should be considered so as the prevent the harsh conditions. Unemployment in some or the other way affecting the nation and it is utmost important to reduce it. Hence, I feel the argument should have been supported with statistical data so that the sectors in which there is more unemployment can be prioritized more.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
---|---|---|---|
2021-07-13 | Parth Kharkar | 58 | view |
2019-01-10 | dsingapore | 55 | view |
2018-11-26 | samaslan | 33 | view |
2017-08-31 | elifyeg | 16 | view |
2016-07-01 | chaitupramod | 50 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 10 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 470 350
No. of Characters: 2440 1500
No. of Different Words: 229 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.656 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.191 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.906 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 181 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 145 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 103 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 69 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.111 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.954 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.611 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.3 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.555 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.091 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 244, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...alth issue, which is rising day-by-day. The argument provides us with the wholesome...
^^^
Line 7, column 160, Rule ID: IT_VBZ[1]
Message: Did you mean 'is'?
Suggestion: is
...to increase military funding’s, then it be difficult for the government to control...
^^
Line 9, column 79, Rule ID: A_INFINITVE[1]
Message: Probably a wrong construction: a/the + infinitive
... the factors should be considered so as the prevent the harsh conditions. Unemployment in s...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, but, hence, however, if, look, so, then, while, as to, for example, i feel, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 33.0 19.6327345309 168% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 11.1786427146 179% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 13.6137724551 81% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 28.8173652695 69% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 55.5748502994 92% => OK
Nominalization: 22.0 16.3942115768 134% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2504.0 2260.96107784 111% => OK
No of words: 468.0 441.139720559 106% => OK
Chars per words: 5.35042735043 5.12650576532 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.65116196802 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.01693663181 2.78398813304 108% => OK
Unique words: 231.0 204.123752495 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.49358974359 0.468620217663 105% => OK
syllable_count: 775.8 705.55239521 110% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 6.0 8.76447105788 68% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 66.6200621959 57.8364921388 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 131.789473684 119.503703932 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.6315789474 23.324526521 106% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.21052631579 5.70786347227 91% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 15.0 6.88822355289 218% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.67664670659 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.134083956829 0.218282227539 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0506119633599 0.0743258471296 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0611710802659 0.0701772020484 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0874712071953 0.128457276422 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.078672389529 0.0628817314937 125% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.1 14.3799401198 112% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 38.66 48.3550499002 80% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.1628742515 156% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.197005988 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.05 12.5979740519 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.64 8.32208582834 104% => OK
difficult_words: 113.0 98.500998004 115% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 12.3882235529 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.