There is now evidence that the relaxed pace of life in small towns promotes better health and greater longevity than does the hectic pace of life in big cities. Businesses in the small town of Leeville report fewer days of sick leave taken by individual workers than do businesses in the nearby large city of Masonton. Furthermore, Leeville has only one physician for its one thousand residents, but in Masonton the proportion of physicians to residents is five times as high. Finally, the average age of Leeville residents is significantly higher than that of Masonton residents. These findings suggest that the relaxed pace of life in Leeville allows residents to live longer, healthier lives.
Write a response in which you discuss one or more alternative explanations that could rival the proposed explanation and explain how your explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.
In the argument, the author explains how the relaxed pace of life in small town promotes better health and longevity than the hectic pace of life in big cities. While it is understandable that the residents of the town ‘Leeville’ has better health and living a long healthy life, the argument is full of rife and holes that needed further explanation. To strength his or her proposed explanation and give a cogent conclusion, the author must provide at least three evidence that support his conclusion.
First of all, the author assumes that as the businesses in the Leeville report fewer days of sick taken by individual workers than Masonton, thus people in Leeville must be all healthy. There is a possibility that people in Leeville do not need to take extra sick day because they live close to there work place or the work shedeule is not as hectic as the Masonton’s. furthermore, the author does not give any explanation of his evidence that whether the evidence is how much reliable or representative of the actual scenario. There may be one or two days difference in the average sick day or may be small town business does not report the sick day as the big town people do. The point is, the author only give us his assumption not the representative data of his evidence. The author need to provide the reliable and honest evidence to hold his argument.
Secondly, the author gives another piece of information that Leeville has only one physician per thousand residents while Masonton has five per thousands. Though the author does not provide the actual population of the two towns and whether how much this towns are comparable to each other, he gives information that Manston has more physician than Leeville. The number of physician are not given in the argument but it may be possible that all the complex medical treatment procedure are done in the Masonton. People from the near towns come to Mansonton for it’s better medical facilities and this town has some big hospitals for all kind of treatment while Leeville’s physician only treat mild cases where least medical care is required and refer the pataient of serious illness to Mansonton.
Thirdly, the author explains his position by providing the average age of Leeville residents and comparing with the Mansonton’s residents average age. While it is possible that the residents of Leeville has higher age than Mansonton, it alone does not solve the confusion why author concludes that life of Leeville is relaxed than Mansonton’s. there is a possibility that people of big cities are bored of hectic life and move to small town like Leeville after retirement which explains why the average age of Leeville is higher.
Town of Leeville may have better life quality but it alone does not validate the author conclusion why Leeville has relaxed pace of life promote better health and longitivity. There have many possible explanation to refute the author proposed explanation which required further clarification.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 10 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 501 350
No. of Characters: 2448 1500
No. of Different Words: 195 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.731 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.886 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.585 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 173 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 130 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 99 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 52 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 31.312 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 14.189 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.688 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.393 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.393 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.185 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 369, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Furthermore
...ule is not as hectic as the Masonton’s. furthermore, the author does not give any explanati...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 44, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ondly, the author gives another piece of information that Leeville has only one p...
^^
Line 3, column 251, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...n of the two towns and whether how much this towns are comparable to each other, he ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 704, Rule ID: THE_SUPERLATIVE[3]
Message: A determiner is probably missing here: 'where the least'.
Suggestion: where the least
...ville’s physician only treat mild cases where least medical care is required and refer the ...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 344, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: There
...f Leeville is relaxed than Mansonton’s. there is a possibility that people of big cit...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 397, Rule ID: BORED_OF[1]
Message: Did you mean 'bored with'?
Suggestion: bored with
...ssibility that people of big cities are bored of hectic life and move to small town like...
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, furthermore, if, may, second, secondly, so, third, thirdly, thus, while, at least, kind of, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.6327345309 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 11.1786427146 161% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 13.6137724551 110% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 28.8173652695 108% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 55.5748502994 88% => OK
Nominalization: 24.0 16.3942115768 146% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2503.0 2260.96107784 111% => OK
No of words: 501.0 441.139720559 114% => OK
Chars per words: 4.99600798403 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.73107062784 4.56307096286 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72627218554 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 209.0 204.123752495 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.417165668663 0.468620217663 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 803.7 705.55239521 114% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 22.8473053892 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 43.8521998547 57.8364921388 76% => OK
Chars per sentence: 139.055555556 119.503703932 116% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.8333333333 23.324526521 119% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.44444444444 5.70786347227 113% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.25449101796 114% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.379352584198 0.218282227539 174% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.126881130655 0.0743258471296 171% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.137404864344 0.0701772020484 196% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.226733404056 0.128457276422 177% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0831828826177 0.0628817314937 132% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 16.0 14.3799401198 111% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.07 48.3550499002 91% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.197005988 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.02 12.5979740519 95% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.94 8.32208582834 95% => OK
difficult_words: 94.0 98.500998004 95% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.1389221557 115% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.