"Of the two leading real estate firms in our town—Adams Realty and Fitch Realty—Adams Realty is clearly superior. Adams has 40 real estate agents; in contrast, Fitch has 25, many of whom work only part-time. Moreover, Adams' revenue last year was twice as high as that of Fitch and included home sales that averaged $168,000, compared to Fitch's $144,000. Homes listed with Adams sell faster as well: ten years ago I listed my home with Fitch, and it took more than four months to sell; last year, when I sold another home, I listed it with Adams, and it took only one month. Thus, if you want to sell your home quickly and at a good price, you should use Adams Realty."
the author claims that Adams Realty could sell home quicker and in good price compared with Fitch Realty. However, this claim is without any factual evidences or strong proof
for a couple of reasons described in the following.
To begin with, the author arguments that one of the superiority of Adam in comparison with Fitch is that this firm has more agent which work full time. while the author fails to provide strong statistics about a correlation between part time working and the amount of seals. Since in some countries such as Iran the vast majority of firms who are expert for the selling homes work only part time and specially in the afternoon. Since, the most families are looking for home in this time due to the fact that
this time is out of timing work and they do not need to leave their work for finding home.
Secondly, another problem with this claim is that the author takes the average of revenue into consideration as another factor for superiority. In the first step the author could not provide valid data. Since, the author mentions the amount of revenue is twice for Adams (168000) comparing with 144000$ for Fitch, while the numbers are provided is wrong and the twice of the Adams' revenue is 336000$.
Finally, the reading argues that Adam could sell homes quicker and its reasons is the same experience for selling home. While, the author mentions that his first experience
was related to 5 years old and for two different homes. Probably, in the five years ago there was not a tendency among people to purchase home, but at this time some factor
such as economic promotion has encouraged people to buy home in this place. Furthermore, the author could not show the difference between two home. For example, some
factor such as good location, fair price and the high quality materials used for building play an important rule for selling homes. Thus, the author could not relay on the same
experience for concluding the superiority of Adams.
For aforementioned reasons this argument is flawed, although it could be strengthened if the author provides enough information regarding the details of his experience and
also the situation of two homes. In addition, the author should provide statistics about the number of contracts in these companies in each year. Further strangers would be the average of time which each company need for selling homes in each year and in each location separately.
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 414 350
No. of Characters: 1969 1500
No. of Different Words: 194 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.511 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.756 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.351 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 126 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 92 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 55 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.25 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.888 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.708 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.287 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.699 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.046 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 12 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: The
the author claims that Adams Realty could s...
^^^
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: For
...any factual evidences or strong proof for a couple of reasons described in the fo...
^^^
Line 5, column 142, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled as one.
Suggestion: fulltime
...hat this firm has more agent which work full time. while the author fails to provide stro...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 153, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: While
...rm has more agent which work full time. while the author fails to provide strong stat...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 233, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
... statistics about a correlation between part time working and the amount of seals. Since ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 387, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
... expert for the selling homes work only part time and specially in the afternoon. Since, ...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 508, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...r home in this time due to the fact that this time is out of timing work and they...
^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: This
...me in this time due to the fact that this time is out of timing work and they do ...
^^^^
Line 9, column 294, Rule ID: CURRENCY[1]
Message: The currency mark is usually put at the beginning of the number: '$144000'.
Suggestion: $144000
...s twice for Adams 168000 comparing with 144000$ for Fitch, while the numbers are provid...
^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 391, Rule ID: CURRENCY[1]
Message: The currency mark is usually put at the beginning of the number: '$336000'.
Suggestion: $336000
...g and the twice of the Adams revenue is 336000$. Finally, the reading argues that Ad...
^^^^^^^
Line 11, column 121, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “While” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...s the same experience for selling home. While, the author mentions that his first exp...
^^^^^
Line 11, column 173, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...uthor mentions that his first experience was related to 5 years old and for two d...
^^^^
Line 13, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Was
...r mentions that his first experience was related to 5 years old and for two diff...
^^^
Line 13, column 173, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...chase home, but at this time some factor such as economic promotion has encourage...
^^^^
Line 15, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Such
...e home, but at this time some factor such as economic promotion has encouraged pe...
^^^^
Line 15, column 166, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ence between two home. For example, some factor such as good location, fair price...
^^^^
Line 17, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Factor
... between two home. For example, some factor such as good location, fair price and t...
^^^^^^
Line 19, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Experience
...he author could not relay on the same experience for concluding the superiority of Adams...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 21, column 172, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...arding the details of his experience and also the situation of two homes. In addi...
^^^^
Line 23, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Also
...ng the details of his experience and also the situation of two homes. In addition...
^^^^
Line 23, column 1, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: also,
...ng the details of his experience and also the situation of two homes. In addition...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, furthermore, however, if, look, regarding, second, secondly, so, then, thus, while, for example, in addition, such as, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 19.6327345309 81% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 13.6137724551 73% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 22.0 28.8173652695 76% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 55.5748502994 92% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 16.3942115768 85% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2041.0 2260.96107784 90% => OK
No of words: 414.0 441.139720559 94% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.92995169082 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.51076378781 4.56307096286 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.41712623616 2.78398813304 87% => OK
Unique words: 203.0 204.123752495 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.490338164251 0.468620217663 105% => OK
syllable_count: 620.1 705.55239521 88% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.22255489022 118% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 19.7664670659 91% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 39.9405422294 57.8364921388 69% => OK
Chars per sentence: 113.388888889 119.503703932 95% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.0 23.324526521 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.83333333333 5.70786347227 155% => OK
Paragraphs: 12.0 5.15768463074 233% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 21.0 5.25449101796 400% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.20758483034 97% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 6.88822355289 73% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.13256004008 0.218282227539 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.050534257893 0.0743258471296 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0614811227517 0.0701772020484 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0520255415333 0.128457276422 41% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.054003166317 0.0628817314937 86% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.3 14.3799401198 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 48.3550499002 117% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.61 12.5979740519 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.98 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 84.0 98.500998004 85% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Maximum six paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.