The vice president of human resources at Climpson Industries sent the following recommendation to the company's president.
"In an effort to improve our employees' productivity, we should implement electronic monitoring of employees' Internet use from their workstations. Employees who use the Internet from their workstations need to be identified and punished if we are to reduce the number of work hours spent on personal or recreational activities, such as shopping or playing games. By installing software to detect employees' Internet use on company computers, we can prevent employees from wasting time, foster a better work ethic at Climpson, and improve our overall profits."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
The vice president suggest that the company should implement electronic monitoring of employees' Internet use from their workstations to improve their employees' productivity. However, the claim is plagued by a number of skewed assumptions.
First, the vice president seems to assume that by identifying and punishing employees who use the Internet from the workstations, the company can reduce the number of work hours spent on personal or recreational activities. Nonetheless, using the Internet from the workstations doesn’t necessarily mean doing personal activities. They may be dealing with some tasks that needs the Internet from the workstation. Since workstations typically have much more computing power than personal computers do, using workstations may be a good choice if the employees are given a task that requires a lot of computation. Also, perhaps a lot of the company’s data can only be accessed via workstations. If this is the case, then maybe the high usage of workstations may result from the high involvement of the employees with their work.
On the other hand, if the employees spent their time on personal or recreational activities, it is highly likely that they are using their own Wi-Fi instead of the Internet of the workstations. If such behaviors as shopping or playing games are not welcomed in the company, the employees will do these things in a clandestine way and not dare to use the workstations. Moreover, since a lot of people have bought their own Wi-Fi access, it is highly likely that they will use their own smartphones or laptops, which always connect to their personal Wi-Fi instead of the workstation’s.
Moreover, the vice president fails to consider what type of company Climpson Industries is. If it is a company that encourage creativity and innovation, like Apple and Amazon, then restricting what the employees should do may be detrimental to their abilities. In a lot of technological companies, employees have freedom to do almost anything they like as long as they can fulfill the tasks they are given to. In this companies, employees are like artists; they need unbridled freedom to foster creativity and innovation. While it seems that playing games or shopping may not be a good behavior, the employers may be coming up with some good ideas by searching for inspirations in recreational activities. Even if this is a traditional company, monitoring employees may cause them to feel that the company doesn’t trust them, which will lead to a low morale and trepidation. Thus, this act may not foster a better work ethic at Climpson, and improve the overall profits. It will probably harm the atmosphere of the whole company and lead to a downturn in the overall profits.
All in all, to make the argument more convincing, The vice president of human resources at Climpson Industries should address the assumptions as above mentioned.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 10 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 473 350
No. of Characters: 2367 1500
No. of Different Words: 204 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.664 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.004 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.899 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 158 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 132 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 102 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 76 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.65 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.964 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.75 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.329 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.54 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.106 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 310, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a clandestine way" with adverb for "clandestine"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...any, the employees will do these things in a clandestine way and not dare to use the workstations. M...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 1, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Two successive sentences begin with the same adverb. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
... Wi-Fi instead of the workstation’s. Moreover, the vice president fails to consider w...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 414, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...fulfill the tasks they are given to. In this companies, employees are like artists; ...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, however, if, may, moreover, nonetheless, so, then, thus, while, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 19.6327345309 92% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 19.0 12.9520958084 147% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 37.0 28.8173652695 128% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 58.0 55.5748502994 104% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 16.3942115768 49% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2441.0 2260.96107784 108% => OK
No of words: 471.0 441.139720559 107% => OK
Chars per words: 5.18259023355 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.65859790218 4.56307096286 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.03629236353 2.78398813304 109% => OK
Unique words: 208.0 204.123752495 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.44161358811 0.468620217663 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 734.4 705.55239521 104% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 4.96107784431 121% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 8.0 2.70958083832 295% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 22.8473053892 101% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.5079993264 57.8364921388 82% => OK
Chars per sentence: 122.05 119.503703932 102% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.55 23.324526521 101% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.7 5.70786347227 82% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.25449101796 57% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.20758483034 134% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.314590864144 0.218282227539 144% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.105373445031 0.0743258471296 142% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.114026132703 0.0701772020484 162% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.221575069024 0.128457276422 172% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.111105995281 0.0628817314937 177% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 14.3799401198 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 48.3550499002 100% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 12.197005988 101% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.06 12.5979740519 104% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.9 8.32208582834 95% => OK
difficult_words: 93.0 98.500998004 94% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 12.3882235529 73% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 11.1389221557 101% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.