When Stanley Park first opened, it was the largest, most heavily used public park in town. It is still the largest park, but it is no longer heavily used. Video cameras mounted in the park's parking lots last month revealed the park's drop in popularity: the recordings showed an average of only 50 cars per day. In contrast, tiny Carlton Park in the heart of the business district is visited by more than 150 people on a typical weekday. An obvious difference is that Carlton Park, unlike Stanley Park, provides ample seating. Thus, if Stanley Park is ever to be as popular with our citizens as Carlton Park, the town will obviously need to provide more benches, thereby converting some of the unused open areas into spaces suitable for socializing.
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.
In this passage, the author argues that Stanly Park needs to provide more benches to make the park heavily used. Although the argument may seem convincing at first, the unwarranted assumptions lead me to question the validity of the argument.
First, the author assumes that the recordings of video cameras mounted in the Stanley Park’s parking lots last month indicates the park’s drop in popularity. It is possible that average of 50 cars per day is not minute. The number of people in the town may have been minute, and thus, 50 cars per day may be significant. Also, each car might bring up to four people to the park. Even if 50 cars per day is marginal, the recordings on last month might not be lasting for the following months. Indeed, the recordings might not reveal the park’s drop in popularity.
Another assumption by the author is that Carlton Park in the heart of the business district is visited by more than 150 people on a typical weekday, so Carlton Park is more popular than Stanly Park. It is plausible that the number of people in the business district is substantial, so 150 people are negligible. In addition, the results are only on a typical weekday. It is likely that people in the business district go to the park on a weekday, so there might be less people than those in Stanley Park on a whole week.
Lastly, the author assumes that an obvious difference is that Carlton Park, unlike Stanley Park, provides ample seating, so Stanley Park needs to provide more benches at the unused open areas. Even if Carlton Park is popular than Stanley Park, the reason might not be more ample seating. Carlton Park may provide other attractions, such as health devices, more trees, more amusements, and more tracks. Also, more benches might not help Stanley Park because people may not be interested in walking and just want to work out or play badminton with their children. Stanley Park doesn’t need to convert the unused open areas into socializing spaces.
In brief, the author’s claim is unconvincing on many grounds. To bolster the argument, he should rethink his assumptions.
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 364 350
No. of Characters: 1688 1500
No. of Different Words: 169 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.368 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.637 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.364 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 123 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 88 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 41 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 23 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.158 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.761 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.737 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.36 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.598 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.131 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
In this passage, the author argues that ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tion the validity of the argument. first, the author assumes that the recor...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 17, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: First
...y of the argument. first, the author assumes that the recordings...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 185, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
...tes the park's drop in popularity. it is possible that average of 50 cars per...
^^
Line 5, column 349, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Also
...s, 50 cars per day may be significant. also, each car might bring up to four people...
^^^^
Line 5, column 407, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Even
...ht bring up to four people to the park. even if 50 cars per day is marginal, the rec...
^^^^
Line 9, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...he park's drop in popularity. Another assumption by the author is that...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 216, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
... park is more popular than stanly park. it is plausible that the number of people ...
^^
Line 9, column 385, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: It
... results are only on a typical weekday. it is likely that people in the business d...
^^
Line 9, column 482, Rule ID: FEWER_LESS[2]
Message: Did you mean 'fewer'? The noun people is countable.
Suggestion: fewer
...he park on a weekday, so there might be less people than those in stanley park on a ...
^^^^
Line 9, column 538, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... those in stanley park on a whole week. Lastly, the author assum...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 210, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Even
... more benches at the unused open areas. even if carlton park is popular than stanley...
^^^^
Line 13, column 305, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Carlton
...reason might not be more ample seating. carlton park may provide other attractions, suc...
^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 419, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Also
...rees, more amusements, and more tracks. also, more benches might not help stanley pa...
^^^^
Line 13, column 579, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Stanley
... or play badminton with their children. stanley park doesn't need to convert the u...
^^^^^^^
Line 17, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...pen areas into socializing spaces. In brief, the author's claim is unc...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, if, lastly, may, so, thus, in addition, in brief, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 4.0 11.1786427146 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 8.0 13.6137724551 59% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 17.0 28.8173652695 59% => OK
Preposition: 42.0 55.5748502994 76% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 16.3942115768 43% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1781.0 2260.96107784 79% => OK
No of words: 363.0 441.139720559 82% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.90633608815 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.3649236973 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59939216373 2.78398813304 93% => OK
Unique words: 171.0 204.123752495 84% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.471074380165 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 528.3 705.55239521 75% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.67365269461 119% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 19.7664670659 96% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 22.8473053892 83% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 44.185393859 57.8364921388 76% => OK
Chars per sentence: 93.7368421053 119.503703932 78% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.1052631579 23.324526521 82% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.68421052632 5.70786347227 65% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 16.0 5.25449101796 305% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 6.88822355289 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.67664670659 171% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.377294092696 0.218282227539 173% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.132239078385 0.0743258471296 178% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.129455507345 0.0701772020484 184% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.195651549072 0.128457276422 152% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.103573779887 0.0628817314937 165% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.3 14.3799401198 79% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 48.3550499002 125% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 12.197005988 78% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.2 12.5979740519 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.75 8.32208582834 93% => OK
difficult_words: 73.0 98.500998004 74% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 12.3882235529 89% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.1389221557 86% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.9071856287 92% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.