The Best way for society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry brother fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.
it is being stated that the optimal way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation instead of competition. In my opinion, this statement is very credential.
Admittedly, competition can sometimes serve to provoke people to work hard and achieve better result. In order to become a qualified leader in a myriad of fields, one must have a strong ambition. For example, one might think that him is so talented at playing piano because his non-professional family members always praised him whatever he plays; however, one day after he participated in a piano competition, he finally realized that, compare with others, he still need to work a lot harder. Since then, he increased the amount of time for practicing piano every single day. As a result, he become a famous pianist and a leading figure in the field of music. thus, competition might be a good way to prepare one for his or her future leadership.
However, the benefits of cooperation outweight the merits that competition can bring.
First of all, cooperation is an effective way to enlarge one's creativity. For a leader, creativity and flexibility is crucial because no one can predict what kind of problem he is going to face in the future. thus to be capable of solving various problems, one must be creative and flexible enough to come up with suitable solution for possible issues. when a group of people work together, a perfect environment for brainstorm is created. one can always listen to others' ideas and broaden himsef's knowledge. Secondly, cooperation will always come with conflicts between people, and to be capable of mitigate a contentious situation is also an essential ability that a leader should have. Youyou Tu, one of the most well-known scientists in our modern society, has been a great leader for her team. she always listen to her team members' suggestions and advices, and when there was a tension between the members, she has always been impartial and reasonable and never being biased. Eventually, they worked together to successfully invented the cure for malaria. thus, cooperation will always benefit one as it is a great way to prepare for future leadership.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2019-09-29 | christine_cui | 50 | view |
| 2018-09-21 | prakan4 | 50 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
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Suggestion: It
it is being stated that the optimal way fo...
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Suggestion: Thus
...a leading figure in the field of music. thus, competition might be a good way to pre...
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Line 15, column 58, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...peration is an effective way to enlarge ones creativity. For a leader, creativity an...
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Suggestion: Thus
...blem he is going to face in the future. thus to be capable of solving various proble...
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Line 15, column 210, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: thus,
...blem he is going to face in the future. thus to be capable of solving various proble...
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Suggestion: When
... suitable solution for possible issues. when a group of people work together, a perf...
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Suggestion: One
... environment for brainstorm is created. one can always listen to others ideas and b...
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Suggestion: She
..., has been a great leader for her team. she always listen to her team members sugge...
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Line 15, column 811, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[3]
Message: The pronoun 'she' must be used with a third-person verb: 'listens'.
Suggestion: listens
...a great leader for her team. she always listen to her team members suggestions and adv...
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Suggestion: Thus
...essfully invented the cure for malaria. thus, cooperation will always benefit one as...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, finally, first, however, if, second, secondly, so, still, then, thus, well, for example, kind of, as a result, first of all, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 19.5258426966 97% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 12.4196629213 97% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 14.8657303371 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.3162921348 62% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 29.0 33.0505617978 88% => OK
Preposition: 48.0 58.6224719101 82% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 12.9106741573 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1896.0 2235.4752809 85% => OK
No of words: 377.0 442.535393258 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.02917771883 5.05705443957 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.4064143971 4.55969084622 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.87111968473 2.79657885939 103% => OK
Unique words: 213.0 215.323595506 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.564986737401 0.4932671777 115% => OK
syllable_count: 597.6 704.065955056 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 6.24550561798 144% => OK
Article: 2.0 4.99550561798 40% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.10617977528 97% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.77640449438 169% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.2370786517 94% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 23.0359550562 82% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 59.308620498 60.3974514979 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.7894736842 118.986275619 84% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.8421052632 23.4991977007 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.57894736842 5.21951772744 145% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 10.0 7.80617977528 128% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 10.2758426966 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 5.13820224719 58% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.83258426966 62% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.253651583497 0.243740707755 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.082784870858 0.0831039109588 100% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.136874379574 0.0758088955206 181% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.192017096223 0.150359130593 128% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.196786424577 0.0667264976115 295% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.2 14.1392134831 86% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 52.19 48.8420337079 107% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 12.1743820225 88% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.89 12.1639044944 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.77 8.38706741573 105% => OK
difficult_words: 100.0 100.480337079 100% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 11.8971910112 92% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 11.2143820225 86% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 11.7820224719 93% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.