The chart below show the main reasons for study among students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisons where relevant.

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The chart below show the main reasons for study among students of different age groups and the amount of support they received from employers.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparisons where relevant.

The graphs compares the reasons for study for student according to age group and the support they get from their employer.

It can be clearly seen that,the people below around 50 is more career concious. So they seem to study for their career. And the first graph shows,people of age more than 50 want to pursue their interest. The youths below 26 are shown to be more concentrated on career which is given as 80%. Overall,at ghe young age people are try to build their career and as the time passes and they try to study due to their interest in particular subject.

Nextly,in the second graph,it is seen that students under the age of 26 get more support which is presented as nearly 70 percent and has topped the graph. After age of 26, the percentage in graph shows that the support goes on decreasing upto age around 40 but interestingly after the age of 40 the percentage of support they get is shown to be increasing moderately upto the elderly.

Hence from graph it is obvious that youngsters are devoted in career building and aged people want to do what they are interested in and youngsters as well as elderly get more support from employees than the middle aged persons.

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Comments

people are try to build their career
people try to build their career

youngsters as well as elderly get more support from employees than the middle aged persons.
youngsters as well as elderly get more support from employers than the middle aged persons.

Sentence: It can be clearly seen that,the people below around 50 is more career concious.
Error: concious Suggestion: conscious

Sentence: Overall,at ghe young age people are try to build their career and as the time passes and they try to study due to their interest in particular subject.
Error: ghe Suggestion: the

Sentence: After age of 26, the percentage in graph shows that the support goes on decreasing upto age around 40 but interestingly after the age of 40 the percentage of support they get is shown to be increasing moderately upto the elderly.
Error: upto Suggestion: up to

flaws:
Don't forget punctuation marks, like:

Hence from graph it is obvious that youngsters are devoted in career building and aged people want to do what they are interested in and youngsters as well as elderly get more support from employees than the middle aged persons.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 9 10
No. of Words: 217 200
No. of Characters: 952 1000
No. of Different Words: 102 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.838 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.387 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.277 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 57 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 37 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 21 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 14 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.111 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.878 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.425 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.68 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.061 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4