The bar chart below describes some changes about the percentage of people were born in Australia and who were born outside Australia living in urban rural and town between 1995 and 2010

Essay topics:

The bar chart below describes some changes about the percentage of people were born in Australia and who were born outside Australia living in urban, rural and town between 1995 and 2010.

The bar chart depicts how the number of peple who live in 3 different types of areas and were born inside or outside Australia shifted in 1995 and 2010.
It’s clear to see the propotion of people whose birthplace was in cities was higher than this number in the countryside or towns. Moreover, while the percentage of Australian who were born in cities increased from 1995 to 2010, the number of those who were born in towns and rural areas declined over this period of time.
In 1995, the number of people whose birthplace is Australian cities account for approximately 50%, whereas 20% of people who were born in Australia were born in towns and 30% of them were born in rural areas. For people whose were born in onther countries, 60% of them were born in urban areas. The percentages of people whose birthplace is other countries’ towns and rural areas was 15% and 40% respectively.
In 2010, the percentage of people who was born in Australian cities and other countries cities grew to more than 60% and 80% respectively. Over 15 years, while the percentage of Australian whose birthplace is towns in this country dropped slightly to under 20%, this number felt significantly for the Australia countryside from 30 % in 1995 to only half of that in 2010. Similarly, the percentage of people born in other countries’ town dropped slightly to 10%, this number declined significantly to about 5% for rural areas.

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Average: 6.7 (1 vote)
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Essays by user tragiang0606 :

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 306, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
...owns and rural areas declined over this period of time. In 1995, the number of people whose ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
if, moreover, similarly, whereas, while

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 7.0 214% => Less to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 1.00243902439 0% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 6.8 147% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 3.15609756098 349% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 10.0 5.60731707317 178% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 48.0 33.7804878049 142% => OK
Nominalization: 1.0 3.97073170732 25% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1180.0 965.302439024 122% => OK
No of words: 244.0 196.424390244 124% => OK
Chars per words: 4.83606557377 4.92477711251 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.95227774224 3.73543355544 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68748778365 2.65546596893 101% => OK
Unique words: 98.0 106.607317073 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.401639344262 0.547539520022 73% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 341.1 283.868780488 120% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.45097560976 96% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 1.53170731707 196% => OK
Article: 6.0 4.33902439024 138% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 1.07073170732 187% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.482926829268 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 3.36585365854 89% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 9.0 8.94146341463 101% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 22.4926829268 120% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 43.6631324552 43.030603864 101% => OK
Chars per sentence: 131.111111111 112.824112599 116% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.1111111111 22.9334400587 118% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.33333333333 5.23603664747 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 3.83414634146 104% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 1.69756097561 59% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 3.70975609756 216% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 1.13902439024 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.09268292683 24% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.446441946426 0.215688989381 207% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.222538788962 0.103423049105 215% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.129601334869 0.0843802449381 154% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.317315006834 0.15604864568 203% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0843797312001 0.0819641961636 103% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.9 13.2329268293 113% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 60.99 61.2550243902 100% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.51609756098 48% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.3012195122 112% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.09 11.4140731707 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.11 8.06136585366 88% => OK
difficult_words: 33.0 40.7170731707 81% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 11.4329268293 114% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 10.9970731707 116% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.0658536585 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 67.4157303371 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.