The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at Queen Mary Hospital since its construction in 1960.
The diagrams give information about the development of Queen Mary Hospital over three different time periods between 1960, 1980 and 2000.
Overall, Hospital had never changed from the beginning of the year to 2000. The Farmland and Shopping Centre were removed in 1980 and reconstructed to Cancer Centre and Nursing School. However, the size of the car park was halved at 2000. Moreover, Pharmacy were built in 1980 and remained unchanged to 2000.
As it can be seen that, in 1960, there were four building which were Shopping Centre, Hospital, Farmland and Car Park. After 20 years later, Shopping Centre and Farmland were demolished and rebuilt to three new building which were Cancer Centre, Pharmacy and Nursing School. Furthermore, Hospital and Car Park were remained unchanged from 1960 to 1980.
On the other hand, in 2000, The size of the Cancer Centre was extended while Nursing School and Car Park were halved. Although Hospital stayed the same, most building were significant changed from 1960 to 2000.
flaws:
Some duplicate content in the second paragraph. You can't go details in the conclusion paragraph.
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Attribute Value Ideal
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Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.589 4.0
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Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.112 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4