Countries are much more interesting and develop more quickly when their population includes a mixture of different nationalities and cultures.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Multiculturalism has become a trend in many countries worldwide. It is believed that multiculturalism will make countries more interesting and develop more faster. In my perspective, I tend to agree with this statement and will elaborate below.
There are certainly some reasons why countries will become more interesting. To start with, more recreational activities can be introduced. Chinese Chess, which originated from china, has gained its popularity in western countries. Active participation of such activities allows local people to experiences the fascination of Chinese culture. Apart from this, traditions in foreign countries also diversify local culture. Australians, for example, realize that there is another way to Chinese New Year by making Chinese dishes such rice cakes and coke chicken, during celebrating Spring Festival. As a result, local people may learn more about the culture of different nationalities and cuisine.
However, there are opposing voices saying that mixture of different nationalities in countries not always positive development. On the one hand, foreign experts may help the current country boost the productivity. As most experts come from developed countries with advanced technology knowledge, they would possible create more sophisticated machines for Australia, which may vastly increase the output of the manufacturing industry. On the other hand, language barrier is a headache to many employers. In most cases, immigrants speak limited English because they have never learned that language before they migrate to Australia. Due to poor communication in workplace, it results low efficiency.
In conclusion, multiculturalism has both positives and negatives. However, I still think this should be adopted because its advantages outweigh disadvantages.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
---|---|---|---|
2015-07-13 | edisontay90 | 45 | view |
- The graph below shows the number of books read by men and women at Burnaby Public Library from 2011 to 2014. 70
- The chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of the telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories, from 1995-2002. 70
- Mobile phones and the Internet are useful tools. However, not many elderly people use them. In what ways can mobile phones and the Internet be useful to elderly people? How can elderly people be encouraged to use them? 60
- In many countries there are people with extremely high income. Some say it is good for the country, while others claim that governments should limit salaries. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. 70
- Young people should be encouraged to spend a gap year or two travelling around different countries when they finish school or university. Do you think this is a good idea? 80
Comments
Thank you very much for the
Thank you very much for the corrections.
I do have a question.
If i didn't make those mistakes in this essay,
what score would it be ?
You may get 6.5.
You may get 6.5.
and develop more faster.
and develop much faster.
Chinese Chess, which originated from china, has gained its popularity
Chinese Chess, which was originated from china, has gained its popularity
Chinese Chess, originated from china, has gained its popularity
mixture of different nationalities in countries not always positive development.
mixture of different nationalities in countries is not always a positive development.
they would possible create more sophisticated machines
they would possibly create more sophisticated machines
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
You have issues on sentence structure and grammar.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 262 350
No. of Characters: 1500 1500
No. of Different Words: 171 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.023 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.725 4.6
Word Length SD: 3.095 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 120 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 99 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 66 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 53 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.556 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.698 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.611 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.285 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.484 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.041 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5