Modern form of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their families and friends This had negative effect on their lives.what extend do you agree or disagree?

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Modern form of communication such as email and messaging have reduced the amount of time people spend seeing their families and friends This had negative effect on their lives.what extend do you agree or disagree?

  Everyone has mobile phone in their hand, so they can text message or post some emails to their friends. People think hat it reduces communication intensity with others. Paragraphs below will discuss about pros and cons of the matter.

  Old generation will complain if their younger families do not go back to hause in Iedul Fitri, Christmas day or the other thanksgiving days. Their children think that it is enough to say greeting by phone, message, or email. The impact are the parents perhaps blame sophisticated technologies are the cause and think that it can reduce social relation with other people lively.

  However, email and messages bring advantages too. I can give my friends birthday greeting by message. Also my lecturer always ask her students to collect our tasks by email. It is more effective because air line communication is more simple than facing other people directly. Sometimes they are too busy and make it as a solution. In addition, They also help people who have problem to keep connecting with their old friends who are in long distance. Actually message and email are not only reason. In the fact, traffic jam is also cause. I will be lazy to go somewhere if the traffic jam treats. I choose stay in home while call or attach message to my relatives. Business activities, phycology condition and distance are other excuses.

  In conclusion, airline service has changed human lifestyle, especially in the social system. It will reduce intensity social contact lively but I disagree if it was the only explanation. In point of fact we can be more easy to get information about our families and friends.

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2014-02-26 Rahmi 60 view
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The impact are the parents perhaps blame sophisticated technologies are the cause and think that it can reduce social relation with other people lively.
Description: can you re-write this sentence?

Everyone has mobile phone in their hand,
Everyone has mobile phones in his hand,

Sentence: Business activities, phycology condition and distance are other excuses.
Error: phycology Suggestion: psychology

flaws:
Avg. Sentence Length: 13.75 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.058 7.5
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.048 0.07

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 275 350
No. of Characters: 1320 1500
No. of Different Words: 166 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.072 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.8 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.537 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 94 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 69 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 44 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 24 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 13.75 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.058 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.55 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.27 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.448 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.048 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5