Successful sports professional can earn a great deal money than people in other important professions. Some people think this fully justified while others think it is unfair.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Peoples think some professions can earn much money. Some important professions for examples, doctor, lawyer, bussinesman, entrepreuneur and architect are believed as prestigious professions that receive high salary for their works. To be professional in their jobs, they had to study seriously when they were in campus. Beside that they also work as beginners in their profession and then try to get much experiences to be expert in their professions.
Nowadays, sports professional reputed as one of professions that can earn a great deal money. Peoples who think this fully justified consider they reasonable to get much money because to be professional they must do so many hard exercises. For instance, professional football players have passed alot of selection and have some best performances to join in famous football club. A badminton player have very discipline of exercise and very tight schedule to be a master. Motor racing is one of dangerous sport. Some times, a motor racer could get injury or crashed in a competiton. They also have limited productive ages to work or specified ages to take part in a competition. That’s why sports professional are paid more than other professions.
In case, not all sports professional earn much money for their great achievements. For example, in Indonesia, alot of sports professional did not paid fairly. This profession still considered as easy works by society eventhough this job really need alot of skills and hard exercises. However, in my opinion all professionals are able to earn great deal money depend on their dedications and the way how they looking for the opportunities.
- A government’s role is only to provide defence capability and urban infrastructure (road, water supplies, etc.). All other services ( education, health, social security) should be provided by private groups or individuals in the community.Give reasons for 60
- The table below gives information about changes in modes of travel in England between 1985 and 2000.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. 70
- Successful sports professional can earn a great deal money than people in other important professions. Some people think this fully justified while others think it is unfair.Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. 70
Sentence: Peoples who think this fully justified consider they reasonable to get much money because to be professional they must do so many hard exercises.
Description: A verb, past participle is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to justified and consider
That's why sports professional are paid more than other professions.
That's why sports professionals are paid more than other professions.
Sentence: However, in my opinion all professionals are able to earn great deal money depend on their dedications and the way how they looking for the opportunities.
Description: The fragment money depend on is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace depend with verb, past participle
Sentence: Some important professions for examples, doctor, lawyer, bussinesman, entrepreuneur and architect are believed as prestigious professions that receive high salary for their works.
Error: entrepreuneur Suggestion: entrepreneur
Error: bussinesman Suggestion: businessman
Sentence: For instance, professional football players have passed alot of selection and have some best performances to join in famous football club.
Error: alot Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Some times, a motor racer could get injury or crashed in a competiton.
Error: competiton Suggestion: competition
Sentence: For example, in Indonesia, alot of sports professional did not paid fairly.
Error: alot Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: This profession still considered as easy works by society eventhough this job really need alot of skills and hard exercises.
Error: alot Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: eventhough Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.5 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.679 7.5
Number of Paragraphs: 3 5
better to have 5 paragraphs:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1
para 3: reason 2
para 4: reason 3 (optional)
para 5: conclusion
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 7 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 264 350
No. of Characters: 1346 1500
No. of Different Words: 154 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.031 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.098 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.928 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 86 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 65 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 52 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 43 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.5 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.679 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.326 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.466 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.072 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 5