Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think its unfair.Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Essay topics:

Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think its unfair.
Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

The sports professionals often gain wealth in numerous deal, compared with other professions, which is giving debatable amongst people who think that its not fair with conceivable reason. Therefore, those explained views will be ordered in the following paragraph.

Some people assume that sports professionals, encompassing athletes and the coaches, should paid highly, due to their responsibility to winning the game. Both of sportsmen and coaches , work across a number of hard exercises and it takes much efforts altogether. Moreover, certain tournaments give large amount of rewards which make all those hard work paid worthly, for instance the soccer player whose goal scored by will gain higher reward than another.

Another body, people often think that the government spend much expenditures for dealing with sports professionals which make it arguably. Prior to the fact that other professions such as academic major experts, military services, or another ones which take much efforts, also need the similar rate of incomes. Otherwise, the people who make this circumstance disagreeably, learn that another career should take attentions rather than sportsmen.

To sum up, i understand that successful sports professionals or other experts should paid balanced with their hardwork, however for certain athletes are able to reach their wealth by gaining more scores, joining more games, or sometimes they often recruit for sports advertise, which make it beneficial to supports their career.

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Comments

in numerous deal,
in numerous deals,

which is giving debatable amongst people
which is debatable amongst people

its not fair with conceivable reason.
it's not fair with a conceivable reason.

should paid highly,
should be paid highly,

Sentence: Moreover, certain tournaments give large amount of rewards which make all those hard work paid worthly, for instance the soccer player whose goal scored by will gain higher reward than another.
Description: The word by is not usually used as an adverb
Suggestion: Refer to by , did you mean buy

Sentence: Another body, people often think that the government spend much expenditures for dealing with sports professionals which make it arguably.
Description: The fragment government spend much is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace spend with verb, present tense, 3rd person singular

Sentence: Prior to the fact that other professions such as academic major experts, military services, or another ones which take much efforts, also need the similar rate of incomes.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to another and ones

should paid balanced with their hardwork
should be paid balanced with their hardwork

Sentence: Moreover, certain tournaments give large amount of rewards which make all those hard work paid worthly, for instance the soccer player whose goal scored by will gain higher reward than another.
Error: worthly Suggestion: No alternate word

Sentence: To sum up, i understand that successful sports professionals or other experts should paid balanced with their hardwork, however for certain athletes are able to reach their wealth by gaining more scores, joining more games, or sometimes they often recruit for sports advertise, which make it beneficial to supports their career.
Error: hardwork Suggestion: No alternate word

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2

No. of Words: 227 350

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 9
Category: Poor Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 8 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 9 15
No. of Words: 227 350
No. of Characters: 1240 1500
No. of Different Words: 143 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.882 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.463 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.649 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 97 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 67 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 43 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 30 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25.222 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.84 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.444 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.406 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.676 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.059 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5