Q20 The family has a great influence on childen s development but the influence from outside the home plays a bigger part in children s life Do you agree or disagree

Essay topics:

Q20. The family has a great influence on childen's development, but the influence from outside the home plays a bigger part in children's life. Do you agree or disagree?

Q20.

Recently, the impact of families on children's behaviour has become the subject of heated debate. Some people assert that parents play a vital role in the development of children's personalities, while others argue otherwise. Personally, I believe that both arguments should be given equal weight. In the following essay, both views will be discussed before a conclusion is reached with my opinion.

On the one hand, it seems difficult to refute the idea that parents greatly affect the behaviour of children. Perhaps the most compelling reason is that young people have a predisposition to follow their parent's behaviour considering that all children rely on their parents at the beginning of the socialisation process before receiving primary education. As a brief illustration, children with parents suffering from obesity because of undesirable eating habits, such as over-consumption of junk food, are more likely to become overweight as they often consume the same unhealthy food eaten by their parents. For these reasons, there does seem to be a solid basis for the claim that the parent's role in children's behaviour is crucial.

On the other hand, it seems short-sighted to contend that only family members exert an influence on children's characteristics. The most oft-cited argument against such a view is that in the fiercely competitive society, a multitude of working parents leading a hectic life have difficulty spending enough time with their offspring due to devotion to work. Thus, a large number of children communicate more frequently with thier friends and teachers than their father and mother. As a result, they often learn behaviour patterns and habits from their peers and teachers. In addition, the development of technology makes it possible for youngsters to make use of their time online, meaning that adolescents who generally are incapable of distinguishing right from wrong can be exposed to huge amounts of harmful and obscene information, having a detrimental effect on young people's personalities.

In conclusion, it is undeniable that there are a variety of opinions about this topic. However, after considering this matter in a careful manner, it can be concluded that each side of the debate has its strengths, as discussed above.

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Average: 8.9 (1 vote)
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Essays by user idid382003 :

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 689, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'parents'' or 'parent's'?
Suggestion: parents'; parent's
...be a solid basis for the claim that the parents role in childrens behaviour is crucial....
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 363, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
...ffspring due to devotion to work. Thus, a large number of children communicate more frequently wi...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 896, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... effect on young peoples personalities. In conclusion, it is undeniable that the...
^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 127, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a careful manner" with adverb for "careful"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
... However, after considering this matter in a careful manner, it can be concluded that each side of ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
however, if, so, thus, while, in addition, in conclusion, such as, as a result, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 13.1623246493 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 4.0 7.85571142285 51% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 10.4138276553 48% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 12.0 7.30460921844 164% => OK
Pronoun: 31.0 24.0651302605 129% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 55.0 41.998997996 131% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.3376753507 144% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1927.0 1615.20841683 119% => OK
No of words: 359.0 315.596192385 114% => OK
Chars per words: 5.36768802228 5.12529762239 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.35284910392 4.20363070211 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.00129936712 2.80592935109 107% => OK
Unique words: 215.0 176.041082164 122% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.598885793872 0.561755894193 107% => OK
syllable_count: 594.0 506.74238477 117% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 6.0 5.43587174349 110% => OK
Article: 5.0 2.52805611222 198% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.10420841683 238% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.76152304609 126% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 16.0721442886 93% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.2975951904 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 72.8458341675 49.4020404114 147% => OK
Chars per sentence: 128.466666667 106.682146367 120% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.9333333333 20.7667163134 115% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.46666666667 7.06120827912 92% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.01903807615 80% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.67935871743 92% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.9879759519 100% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 3.4128256513 88% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.124007444528 0.244688304435 51% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0396421533741 0.084324248473 47% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0385401048679 0.0667982634062 58% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0618682060026 0.151304729494 41% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0383512714475 0.056905535591 67% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.8 13.0946893788 121% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 39.67 50.2224549098 79% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.4 11.3001002004 119% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.16 12.4159519038 114% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.53 8.58950901804 111% => OK
difficult_words: 108.0 78.4519038076 138% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 9.78957915832 82% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.1190380762 111% => OK
text_standard: 16.0 10.7795591182 148% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.