Some countries encourage teenagers to have part time job and see it as a good thing, while others disagree. Give your opinion and explain both views.

Essay topics:

Some countries encourage teenagers to have part time job and see it as a good thing, while others disagree. Give your opinion and explain both views.

Nowadays, part time jobs are often regarded by many parents and societies as a beneficial activity that will equip their teenagers with important social knowledge and skills. However, I believe that there are hidden risks and drawbacks that can potentially outweigh these surface benefits.

Firstly, given their small age and limited life experience, many teenagers do not have the ability to protect themselves in unfortunate adult work environment. Most notably, sexual abuse, which has been happening more and more recently, is definitely a dangerous risk that many working teenagers face. This problem becomes even more severe because it is hard to detect: the victims, being ashamed and threatened, do not dare to tell anyone else what happened to them.

Secondly, teenagers may be exploited in the workplace: they may be asked to do unsuitable jobs or receive payment that is not worth their work. Even more dangerously, teenagers could be manipulated into helping illegal activities without their knowing. For example, during the opioid epidemic in Vietnam, it was reported that drug traffickers paid a very small amount to trick many teenagers into delivering drugs for them.

On the other hand, many people argue that certain benefits of doing part time jobs could not be replicated by other activities. For example, they argue that it helps teenagers become more mature. In particular, they can understand that money only comes from hard work and so know how to adjust their spending. They can also learn many vital soft skills while doing such jobs. However, I believe that there are many other ways that can effectively teach children these skills. For example, teenagers can join social campaigns, which can help them learn organizational skills, communication skills, and even make new friends of their age group. Volunteering for charitable work should be highly considered because it teaches teenagers to not only understand how far a little money can go for someone in need, but more importantly to share and sympathize. Even when staying at home, teenagers can even better themselves by just helping their parents do housework.

In conclusion, I think that part time jobs are more suitable for older people rather than teenagers. The benefits of these part time jobs could be replicated by instead letting teenagers join youth social and charitable groups. From there, the teenagers can join the adult workplace once they have grown an ability to solve the problems that can go along with these jobs.

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 11, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
Nowadays, part time jobs are often regarded by many parents...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 69, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...le argue that certain benefits of doing part time jobs could not be replicated by other a...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 29, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...sework. In conclusion, I think that part time jobs are more suitable for older people...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 9, column 124, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...r than teenagers. The benefits of these part time jobs could be replicated by instead let...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, however, if, may, second, secondly, so, while, for example, i think, in conclusion, in particular, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 13.1623246493 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 18.0 7.85571142285 229% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 12.0 10.4138276553 115% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 7.30460921844 219% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 42.0 24.0651302605 175% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 33.0 41.998997996 79% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.3376753507 48% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2127.0 1615.20841683 132% => OK
No of words: 406.0 315.596192385 129% => OK
Chars per words: 5.23891625616 5.12529762239 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48881294772 4.20363070211 107% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.61278972458 2.80592935109 93% => OK
Unique words: 222.0 176.041082164 126% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.546798029557 0.561755894193 97% => OK
syllable_count: 656.1 506.74238477 129% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 5.43587174349 147% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 2.0 0.809619238477 247% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.76152304609 105% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 16.0721442886 118% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.2975951904 103% => OK
Sentence length SD: 36.4189229679 49.4020404114 74% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.947368421 106.682146367 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.3684210526 20.7667163134 103% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.52631578947 7.06120827912 107% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.01903807615 80% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.67935871743 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.9879759519 176% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.12687359715 0.244688304435 52% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0481780459818 0.084324248473 57% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0434444890722 0.0667982634062 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0832464453432 0.151304729494 55% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0360508315869 0.056905535591 63% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.9 13.0946893788 106% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 50.16 50.2224549098 100% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.3001002004 102% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.11 12.4159519038 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.94 8.58950901804 92% => OK
difficult_words: 84.0 78.4519038076 107% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 9.78957915832 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.1190380762 103% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.