In some cultures children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message

Essay topics:

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough
What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Different cultures have various methods to bring up children. In many countries, educational systems encourage children to try hard because they think it is just a way to achieve children to their goals. In my opinion, although this creates a sense of competition among children, it can follow other negative effects such as jealousy, hate, and depression if they cannot achieve their goals.
On the one side, it is very good that by this issue children have to try hard. They understand they without attempt no one can reach their aim. They believe everything is possible just should have enough try. In addition, this issue can play a critical role in the future of children and make them stand on their own feet. Not only can they solve their problems independently but also it can shape a strong person of them.
On the other side, educational systems and parents should notice to negative effects that can appear in the long term. Jealousy is one of the minuses effects that are very harmful for a child in his/her earlier years. It can create a sense of hate inside every child toward others who compete with the child. Whereas, in most cases leads to depression when they cannot reach their aims.
Finally, these negative effects can be eliminated by a good education structure which parents and schools must follow. hence, I think in some cultures that this subject is important their people are very successful than other countries like Japan.
In conclusion, delivering this message to children has many positive aspects in their lives that can appear in their adults.

Votes
Average: 6.1 (2 votes)
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Essays by user Ahmad_off :

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 309, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ward others who compete with the child. Whereas, in most cases leads to depression when...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 119, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Hence
... which parents and schools must follow. hence, I think in some cultures that this sub...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, hence, if, so, whereas, i think, in addition, in conclusion, such as, in most cases, in my opinion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 13.1623246493 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 7.85571142285 178% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 10.4138276553 48% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 8.0 7.30460921844 110% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 24.0651302605 158% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 36.0 41.998997996 86% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.3376753507 36% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1315.0 1615.20841683 81% => OK
No of words: 268.0 315.596192385 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.90671641791 5.12529762239 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.04607285448 4.20363070211 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.43032502522 2.80592935109 87% => OK
Unique words: 154.0 176.041082164 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.574626865672 0.561755894193 102% => OK
syllable_count: 403.2 506.74238477 80% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 5.43587174349 147% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.10420841683 48% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.76152304609 147% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 16.0721442886 93% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.2975951904 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 33.0837321554 49.4020404114 67% => OK
Chars per sentence: 87.6666666667 106.682146367 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.8666666667 20.7667163134 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.86666666667 7.06120827912 111% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.67935871743 81% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.9879759519 150% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.32236584535 0.244688304435 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.112392343672 0.084324248473 133% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0726729718327 0.0667982634062 109% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.177904058449 0.151304729494 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.105953864872 0.056905535591 186% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.6 13.0946893788 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 50.2224549098 125% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 11.3001002004 77% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.9 12.4159519038 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.37 8.58950901804 86% => OK
difficult_words: 49.0 78.4519038076 62% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 9.78957915832 82% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.1190380762 87% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 61.797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.5 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 309, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...ward others who compete with the child. Whereas, in most cases leads to depression when...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 119, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Hence
... which parents and schools must follow. hence, I think in some cultures that this sub...
^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, hence, if, so, whereas, i think, in addition, in conclusion, such as, in most cases, in my opinion

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 13.1623246493 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 14.0 7.85571142285 178% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 10.4138276553 48% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 8.0 7.30460921844 110% => OK
Pronoun: 38.0 24.0651302605 158% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 36.0 41.998997996 86% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.3376753507 36% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1315.0 1615.20841683 81% => OK
No of words: 268.0 315.596192385 85% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.90671641791 5.12529762239 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.04607285448 4.20363070211 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.43032502522 2.80592935109 87% => OK
Unique words: 154.0 176.041082164 87% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.574626865672 0.561755894193 102% => OK
syllable_count: 403.2 506.74238477 80% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 5.43587174349 147% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.10420841683 48% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.76152304609 147% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 16.0721442886 93% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.2975951904 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 33.0837321554 49.4020404114 67% => OK
Chars per sentence: 87.6666666667 106.682146367 82% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.8666666667 20.7667163134 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.86666666667 7.06120827912 111% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.67935871743 81% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.9879759519 150% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 3.4128256513 59% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.32236584535 0.244688304435 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.112392343672 0.084324248473 133% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0726729718327 0.0667982634062 109% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.177904058449 0.151304729494 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.105953864872 0.056905535591 186% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.6 13.0946893788 81% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 62.68 50.2224549098 125% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.7 11.3001002004 77% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.9 12.4159519038 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.37 8.58950901804 86% => OK
difficult_words: 49.0 78.4519038076 62% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 9.78957915832 82% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.1190380762 87% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 61.797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.5 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.