Many students spend hours a day using smartphones Why is this the case Do you think this is a positive or a negative development

THESEDAY, It is believed that children SHOULD NOT spend A LOT OF time ON using smartphones .
Although this idea is reasonable to some extent , i would argue that THEY COULD spend many hours on their smartphones .

On the one hand , I i am convinced that children should OWN THEIR smartphones and USE it everyday .

- Firstly , smartphones are extremely convenient for CHILDREN LEARNING / THE STUDYING OF CHILDREN. study of children . WHEN students need to find information or solve a problem BY USING SMARTPHONES TO HAVE ACCESS TO THE INTERNET, IT IS EASIER FOR STUDENT FIND WHAT THEY NEED BY PHONE THAN READING ALL OF TEXTBOOKS. - Secondly , RELATION can easily KEEP IN TOUCH/ STAY IN TOUCH/ REMAIN CONNECTION with their KIDS by callING TO ENSURE THAT THEY ARE SAFE .ACTUALLY/ HONESTLY, I OFTEN MAKE A CALL FOR MY YOUNGER BROTHER TO GUARANTEE HIS SAFENESS, EVEN THOUGH I AM ABLE TO REMAIN CONNECTION TO HIS TUTOR/ TEACHER/ PRINCIPAL TO ASK HIS ACADEMIC RESULT

• Body 2 : IT IS UNDERSTANDABLE WHY SOME PEOPLE AVOCATE + VING

On the other hand , PHONE ABUSE/ADDICTION CAUSE =DETRIMENTAL EFFECT ON EYES DISORDERS AS BLINDNESS, LOW VISION AND LEARNING PROCESS DISRUPTION.

=> RESTRICTING THE TIME OF USING THE PHONE OF THEIR CHILDREN.

- Firstly / ON TOP OF THAT/ FIRST OF ALL/ TO BEGIN WITH/ IN MORE DETAILS, children WOULD suffer many diseases of the eyes SUCH AS BLINDNESS, LOW VISION WHICH NEGATIVELY AFFECT ON the quality of life.. FOR EXAMPLE/ FOR INSTANCE/ IN FACT ,I SUFFER SHORT-SIGHTED AFTER CONSTANTLY USING THE PHONE FOR 5 YEARS. - Secondly/ FURTHERMORE/ ADDITIONALLY/ BESIDES/ MOREOVER/. Smartphones have many/ A VAST/ PLENTY OF/ A LARGE OF/ A DEAL OF/ VARIOUS/ DIVERSE/ DIFFERENT/ A WEALTH OF/ platformS of social media AND GAMES, THEREFORE, childrenl WOULD spend all of their time ON usING it AND FINALLY THE LEARNING IS DISRUPTED.
- Additionally , they ARE REDUCED THE ABILITY OF SOCIAL COMMUNICATION. THIS IS BECAUSE THEY ARE LACK OF PHYSICAL INTERACTIVE AMONG OTHER PEOPLE, WHICH SOLELY ARRIVES WHEN THEY COMMUNICATE DIRECTLY BY SPOKEN.

Votes
Average: 8.4 (1 vote)
Essays by the user:

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
THESEDAY, It is believed that child...
^^
Line 1, column 12, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
THESEDAY, It is believed that children SHOULD NOT...
^^^^^^
Line 1, column 46, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...SEDAY, It is believed that children SHOULD NOT spend A LOT OF time ON using ...
^^
Line 1, column 99, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...spend A LOT OF time ON using smartphones . Although this idea...
^^
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... A LOT OF time ON using smartphones . Although this idea is reasonable to some...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 67, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...h this idea is reasonable to some extent , i would argue that THEY COULD spend ma...
^^
Line 2, column 70, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...his idea is reasonable to some extent , i would argue that THEY COULD spend many...
^
Line 2, column 88, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...able to some extent , i would argue that THEY COULD spend many hours on their sma...
^^
Line 2, column 138, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...LD spend many hours on their smartphones . On the one hand , I i am convinced ...
^^
Line 4, column 17, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... their smartphones . On the one hand , I i am convinced that children should ...
^^
Line 4, column 20, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: I
...eir smartphones . On the one hand , I i am convinced that children should OWN ...
^^^
Line 4, column 22, Rule ID: I_LOWERCASE[2]
Message: Did you mean 'I'?
Suggestion: I
...r smartphones . On the one hand , I i am convinced that children should OWN ...
^
Line 4, column 41, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... On the one hand , I i am convinced that children should OWN THEIR smartphones an...
^^
Line 4, column 92, Rule ID: EVERYDAY_EVERY_DAY[3]
Message: 'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean 'every day'?
Suggestion: every day
...should OWN THEIR smartphones and USE it everyday . - Firstly , smartphones are ext...
^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 100, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...WN THEIR smartphones and USE it everyday . - Firstly , smartphones are extre...
^^
Line 6, column 10, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...hones and USE it everyday . - Firstly , smartphones are extremely convenien...
^^
Line 6, column 12, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...nes and USE it everyday . - Firstly , smartphones are extremely convenient ...
^^
Line 6, column 25, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...t everyday . - Firstly , smartphones are extremely convenient for CHILDREN...
^^
Line 6, column 30, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ryday . - Firstly , smartphones are extremely convenient for CHILDREN LEAR...
^^
Line 6, column 41, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...- Firstly , smartphones are extremely convenient for CHILDREN LEARNING / THE ...
^^
Line 6, column 53, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... smartphones are extremely convenient for CHILDREN LEARNING / THE STUDYING OF ...
^^
Line 6, column 105, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Study
...EN LEARNING / THE STUDYING OF CHILDREN. study of children . WHEN students need to fi...
^^^^^
Line 6, column 122, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
... STUDYING OF CHILDREN. study of children . WHEN students need to find information...
^^
Line 6, column 212, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...e a problem BY USING SMARTPHONES TO HAVE ACCESS TO THE INTERNET, IT IS EASIER FOR...
^^
Line 6, column 333, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...HAN READING ALL OF TEXTBOOKS. - Secondly , RELATION can easily KEEP IN TOUCH/ STA...
^^
Line 6, column 355, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...TBOOKS. - Secondly , RELATION can easily KEEP IN TOUCH/ STAY IN TOUCH/ REMAIN CON...
^^
Line 6, column 451, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...heir KIDS by callING TO ENSURE THAT THEY ARE SAFE .ACTUALLY/ HONESTLY, I OFTEN M...
^^
Line 6, column 456, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...KIDS by callING TO ENSURE THAT THEY ARE SAFE .ACTUALLY/ HONESTLY, I OFTEN MAKE A...
^^
Line 6, column 462, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Don't put a space before the full stop
Suggestion: .
...y callING TO ENSURE THAT THEY ARE SAFE .ACTUALLY/ HONESTLY, I OFTEN MAKE A CALL ...
^^
Line 6, column 503, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
....ACTUALLY/ HONESTLY, I OFTEN MAKE A CALL FOR MY YOUNGER BROTHER TO GUARANTEE HIS ...
^^
Line 10, column 19, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...PLE AVOCATE + VING On the other hand , PHONE ABUSE/ADDICTION CAUSE =DETRIMENTA...
^^
Line 15, column 170, Rule ID: AFFECT_EFFECT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'effect'?
Suggestion: Effect
... BLINDNESS, LOW VISION WHICH NEGATIVELY AFFECT ON the quality of life.. FOR EXAMPLE/ FOR...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 15, column 179, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...S, LOW VISION WHICH NEGATIVELY AFFECT ON the quality of life.. FOR EXAMPLE/ FOR I...
^^
Line 15, column 200, Rule ID: DOUBLE_PUNCTUATION
Message: Two consecutive dots
Suggestion: .
...EGATIVELY AFFECT ON the quality of life.. FOR EXAMPLE/ FOR INSTANCE/ IN FACT ,I S...
^^
Line 15, column 237, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ife.. FOR EXAMPLE/ FOR INSTANCE/ IN FACT ,I SUFFER SHORT-SIGHTED AFTER CONSTANTLY ...
^^
Line 15, column 308, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...CONSTANTLY USING THE PHONE FOR 5 YEARS. - Secondly/ FURTHERMORE/ ADDITIONALLY/ B...
^^
Line 15, column 406, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
.../. Smartphones have many/ A VAST/ PLENTY OF/ A LARGE OF/ A DEAL OF/ VARIOUS/ DIVE...
^^
Line 16, column 2, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ND FINALLY THE LEARNING IS DISRUPTED. - Additionally , they ARE REDUCED THE ABI...
^^
Line 16, column 16, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
... LEARNING IS DISRUPTED. - Additionally , they ARE REDUCED THE ABILITY OF SOCIAL...
^^
Line 16, column 23, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...NG IS DISRUPTED. - Additionally , they ARE REDUCED THE ABILITY OF SOCIAL COMMUN...
^^
Line 16, column 138, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...LACK OF PHYSICAL INTERACTIVE AMONG OTHER PEOPLE, WHICH SOLELY ARRIVES WHEN THEY C...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, besides, finally, first, firstly, furthermore, honestly, if, moreover, second, secondly, so, therefore, for example, for instance, in fact, such as, first of all, to begin with, on the other hand, on top of that

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 13.1623246493 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 9.0 7.85571142285 115% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 10.4138276553 48% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 7.30460921844 123% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 24.0651302605 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 48.0 41.998997996 114% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.3376753507 96% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1739.0 1615.20841683 108% => OK
No of words: 330.0 315.596192385 105% => OK
Chars per words: 5.2696969697 5.12529762239 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.26214759535 4.20363070211 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.99312000209 2.80592935109 107% => OK
Unique words: 196.0 176.041082164 111% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.593939393939 0.561755894193 106% => OK
syllable_count: 514.8 506.74238477 102% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 5.43587174349 147% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.76152304609 21% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 16.0721442886 87% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.2975951904 113% => OK
Sentence length SD: 126.511857152 49.4020404114 256% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 124.214285714 106.682146367 116% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.5714285714 20.7667163134 114% => OK
Discourse Markers: 15.7857142857 7.06120827912 224% => Less transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 9.0 4.38176352705 205% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 41.0 5.01903807615 817% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 8.67935871743 58% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.9879759519 125% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 3.4128256513 117% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.173055468205 0.244688304435 71% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.061006859808 0.084324248473 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0591811354578 0.0667982634062 89% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0806118835994 0.151304729494 53% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0606395655008 0.056905535591 107% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.2 13.0946893788 116% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 50.2224549098 96% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 11.3001002004 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.58 12.4159519038 109% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.94 8.58950901804 116% => OK
difficult_words: 108.0 78.4519038076 138% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 9.78957915832 82% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.1190380762 111% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.7795591182 130% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Maximum five paragraphs wanted.

Rates: 84.2696629213 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.5 Out of 9
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.