Some countries encourage teenagers to have a part-time job and see it as a good thing, while others disagree. Give your opinion and explain both the views.

Intro. (Past) During the bygone days, teenagers had been focusing only on studies, and part time jobs were not heard of.(Present) Today, teenage students, the world over, have been engaging in part time jobs, especially in the developed nations. (Thesis statement) Although there are different views on this topic, I would like to state that it is a good idea for teenagers to take up part time jobs while they are students because they can learn about responsibility and punctuality; about the value of money and also learn how to work as a member of a team.

Body: (Topic Sentence) Students can learn to be responsible and observe punctuality while they study. Eg. They have to come to work on time every day, and there is no room for procrastination. They have to maintain the inventory, update stock registers, and have to be responsible in their duties.

Body: (Topic sentence) In addition to that, students can learn the value of money. (Effect) Students will realize that it takes a lot time and effort to make a living, and this experience will enrich them with confidence to face the vicissitudes of life. Eg. Students will also make the wiser choices when buying things with the money they earned from their sweat.

Body: (Topic Sentence) Moreover, teenage students will learn how to work as a team member and share responsibilities. Students will realize how to compromise with other employees when situation comes. (Effect) Students will learn about the friendship as well that comes from teamwork, which will then develop to a team spirit.

Conclusion: It is a valuable experience for teenagers to have jobs while they are students because they will learn to be responsible adults. They will have an appreciation of money and they will learn about working with others. (Future) All of these traits will benefit them in the days to come, in responding to the realities of life

Votes
Average: 7.3 (1 vote)
Essays by the user:

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 86, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
... had been focusing only on studies, and part time jobs were not heard of.Present Today, t...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 119, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Present
...s, and part time jobs were not heard of.Present Today, teenage students, the world over...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 190, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
..., the world over, have been engaging in part time jobs, especially in the developed natio...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 380, Rule ID: EN_COMPOUNDS
Message: This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
Suggestion: part-time
...is a good idea for teenagers to take up part time jobs while they are students because th...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, if, moreover, so, then, well, while, in addition

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 13.1623246493 91% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 15.0 7.85571142285 191% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 10.4138276553 96% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 7.30460921844 96% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 24.0651302605 104% => OK
Preposition: 49.0 41.998997996 117% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.3376753507 132% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1564.0 1615.20841683 97% => OK
No of words: 319.0 315.596192385 101% => OK
Chars per words: 4.90282131661 5.12529762239 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.22617688928 4.20363070211 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.62497961485 2.80592935109 94% => OK
Unique words: 157.0 176.041082164 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.492163009404 0.561755894193 88% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 480.6 506.74238477 95% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 5.43587174349 74% => OK
Article: 1.0 2.52805611222 40% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.10420841683 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 4.0 0.809619238477 494% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.76152304609 63% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 16.0721442886 87% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.2975951904 108% => OK
Sentence length SD: 63.5372299667 49.4020404114 129% => OK
Chars per sentence: 111.714285714 106.682146367 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.7857142857 20.7667163134 110% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.85714285714 7.06120827912 55% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.01903807615 80% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 8.67935871743 138% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.9879759519 25% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.130906115709 0.244688304435 53% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.051243800508 0.084324248473 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0490597559637 0.0667982634062 73% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.081954556661 0.151304729494 54% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0601728326352 0.056905535591 106% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 13.0946893788 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 50.2224549098 115% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 11.3001002004 95% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.44 12.4159519038 92% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.14 8.58950901804 95% => OK
difficult_words: 69.0 78.4519038076 88% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 18.0 9.78957915832 184% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.1190380762 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.7795591182 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.