Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People today spend too much time on personal enjoyment-doing things they like to do-rather than doing things they should do. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Since the creation of humans, they had a lot of things they should do, or they do for enjoyment. But, unfortunately, the balance between them is not appropriate: people spend too much time on personal enjoyment, rather than doing things they should. I hold this claim for the following reasons: an improvement of life quality, less work hours, a psychological need to enjoy.
The first point is an improvement of life quality. As long as, people have a lot of things to enjoy, they will want to spend hours and hours on them. For example, people in my town had almost nothing to enjoy few decades ago, but now they have PlayStation halls, at least. I know lots of people who can spend 4 or 5 hours there, however they do not spend this time on education.
Secondly, I want to mention work hours. After the industrial revolution people had huge number of jobs, hence they needed a lot of time to work. On the other hand, things have been changed nowadays due to the fact that countries are well-developed, therefore they do not need their population to work for that many hours, which sequentially makes people spend more time on enjoyment.
The final point is a psychological need to enjoy. You have probably seen people who always complain how stressful life they have. Of course, they need to enjoy, but, in many cases, they cross the boundary: they are trying to enjoy more than they actually need.
To sum up, I have to mention that you should also spend time on improving yourself: it will be very beneficial due to high competition between candidates – the people who want to start to work at the certain company. For example, even though I had a lot of free time, I spent certain part of it on learning programming, which will hugely help me among other candidates.
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| 2023-07-17 | M. MEHRABI KERMANI | 60 | view |
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 21 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 315 350
No. of Characters: 1407 1500
No. of Different Words: 158 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.213 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.467 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.474 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 78 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 53 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 36 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 26 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 21 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.194 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.667 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.377 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.606 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.142 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5