Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
When people spend a lot of time watching sports on television or following their favorite team, does it have negative effects on their lives?
No one cast a shadow of doubt on the fact that all people need to allocate much times for leisure time, this is because is necessary for their health. Whether spending considerable times for following our favorite programs such as watching television has negative impact on our life or not is controversial subject. While many people believe that dedication a lot of time for following these programs is harmful for us, others repudiate this claim and believe that allocating a considerable time for watching TV programs and channels has not negative influence on us. I, personally, concur the former viewpoint for two cogent reasons, which I will elucidate in the following paragraphs.
The first reason to point out is that dedication a lot of time for following and watching sports on television triggers significant pressure and stress for us. In fact, when people become dependent on these programs, their behavior changes dramatically. Besides, they stick on these programs, and when their team lose or draw, they get upset. Moreover, many of these individuals take heart attack after losing their team. Many experiments have shown that more than 30 percent of heart attacks occur when people get involved in the stressful practices such as following amazing and incentive football programs. My brother experience is a compelling example of what I mean. He was passion fan of one of my football team in our city, named Steghlal, One game, his team had a important game, and unfortunately, his team got lost, after this happen, he took heart attack and lost his awareness. We were able to transfer him to hospital on time, and save his live. Therefore, had he not got involved in following football games, He would have never took heart attack, and he would have never jeopardize his healthy.
The second subtle reason is that when people get involved in these program tremendously, they become addict these shows and displaying. To clarify, many people allocate a deal amount of times to never lose this programs, and they get involved in these programs gradually, and after that, they could not abandon watching them. When this situation happens and dominates, they cannot handle their programs of life, or manage their timetable. Then, day after day, their dependence increases a lot, and finally they cannot pursue other important life's matters. Indeed, this is like consuming drugs and these materials, and they have to consume more and more. Furthermore, they cannot go to work, or if they go to work, they will not concentrate and engage in their duties. Besides, their behavior with their family changes considerably, in which they do not respect their family, and their family is not important for them. Obviously, all problems stem from getting addict to football games, which they allotted a lot of time for following them. Had they not allocated a lot of time to watch sport games, absolutely they would have never occurred these disorder, and anxious conditions for them.
To wrap it up, contemplating all aforementioned remarks, we reach the conclusion that, people should not spend a lot of time to pursue sport games as a patrons and fans. This is because they lead many pressure and stress, which have detrimental outcome such as heart attack for them, and because they become addict on these programs, which have significant effects on their life.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 76, Rule ID: MUCH_COUNTABLE[1]
Message: Use 'many' with countable nouns.
Suggestion: many
...e fact that all people need to allocate much times for leisure time, this is because...
^^^^
Line 5, column 771, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
... named Steghlal, One game, his team had a important game, and unfortunately, his ...
^
Line 5, column 1044, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'taken'.
Suggestion: taken
...ing football games, He would have never took heart attack, and he would have never j...
^^^^
Line 5, column 1087, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'jeopardized'.
Suggestion: jeopardized
...k heart attack, and he would have never jeopardize his healthy. The second subtle re...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 13, column 197, Rule ID: MANY_NN[1]
Message: Possible agreement error. The noun pressure seems to be countable; consider using: 'many pressures'.
Suggestion: many pressures
...ons and fans. This is because they lead many pressure and stress, which have detrimental outc...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
besides, finally, first, furthermore, if, moreover, second, so, then, therefore, while, i mean, in fact, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 28.0 13.8261648746 203% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.0286738351 163% => OK
Pronoun: 84.0 43.0788530466 195% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 53.0 52.1666666667 102% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2840.0 1977.66487455 144% => OK
No of words: 558.0 407.700716846 137% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.08960573477 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.86024933743 4.48103885553 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63940471801 2.67179642975 99% => OK
Unique words: 255.0 212.727598566 120% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.456989247312 0.524837075471 87% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 861.3 618.680645161 139% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 21.0 9.59856630824 219% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 13.0 1.86738351254 696% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.7665038378 48.9658058833 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 118.333333333 100.406767564 118% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.25 20.6045352989 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.66666666667 5.45110844103 86% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 11.0 3.85842293907 285% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.3017158136 0.236089414692 128% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0946605227463 0.076458572812 124% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0507968876833 0.0737576698707 69% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.19002267698 0.150856017488 126% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0269153533594 0.0645574589148 42% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.2 11.7677419355 121% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.54 10.9000537634 115% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.06 8.01818996416 101% => OK
difficult_words: 116.0 86.8835125448 134% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 10.002688172 145% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 10.247311828 146% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.