Imagine that you plan to donate money to charity to help people in need. If you could give money to only one type of charitable organization, which one of the following would you choose and why?
- An organization that provides food and housing to people in need
- An organization that gives people money to start their own small business
- An organization that provides medical care to people in need
In decades, we would always see or hear from older people, in television or in stories, to help people by any way you want. By the way,these days many charities established in all over the word to find people that need help, and organize the money that people give them to donate between these ones. Generally, I believe that giving money to people to start their own business is so beneficial for their future. I think this way for two main reasons, which are explained in the following section.
First of all, there is a famous proverb that said, teach him/her to catch fish instead of giving a fish. What does it mean? It means that if we give food or house to people in need, they never learn to catch money by their self, to have a job and income, because they used to give money or food for one day from people and it’s a simple way than working. For example, in Iran we see many work kids in ages between 5 to 10 that their parents forced them to go beggary, so they learned it since childhood that begging for money is easier than doing work. As the result, most of them don’t want to go to school and have a university degree, because know to earn money they don’t need any education.
Secondly, all of us without exception hear that sentence from older people, if you want to help a person help him/her to have a job because when someone start his/her own business, in first maybe didn’t have any thing but after a time by earning money he can have anything that desire.so having your own job better than getting money for a temporary time.
In conclusion, I strongly believe that donating money to an organizations that gives money to people to start their own small business is better than giving food or house or medical cure. This is because people must learn to catch their own money instead of begging money for a time zone. From another point of view, if people start their own career after a short time they can get anything they want include food, money, house, and absolutely medical cure
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 135, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , these
...p people by any way you want. By the way,these days many charities established in all ...
^^^^^^
Line 1, column 177, Rule ID: ALL_OVER_THE_WORD[1]
Message: Did you mean 'all over the world' (=globally)?
Suggestion: all over the world
...hese days many charities established in all over the word to find people that need help, and orga...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 289, Rule ID: THESE_ONES[1]
Message: This phrase is probably grammatically incorrect. Write 'these' instead.
Suggestion: these
...that people give them to donate between these ones. Generally, I believe that giving money...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 154, Rule ID: HE_VERB_AGR[1]
Message: The pronoun 'someone' must be used with a third-person verb: 'starts'.
Suggestion: starts
.../her to have a job because when someone start his/her own business, in first maybe di...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 209, Rule ID: ANY_BODY[2]
Message: Did you mean 'anything'?
Suggestion: anything
...wn business, in first maybe didn’t have any thing but after a time by earning money he ca...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 58, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'an organization' or simply 'organizations'?
Suggestion: an organization; organizations
...strongly believe that donating money to an organizations that gives money to people to start the...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, if, may, second, secondly, so, for example, i think, in conclusion, by the way, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 6.0 15.1003584229 40% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 52.0 43.0788530466 121% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 52.0 52.1666666667 100% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1656.0 1977.66487455 84% => OK
No of words: 370.0 407.700716846 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.47567567568 4.8611393121 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.38581623665 4.48103885553 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.18675874428 2.67179642975 82% => OK
Unique words: 183.0 212.727598566 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.494594594595 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 508.5 618.680645161 82% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.86738351254 107% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.94265232975 182% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 20.6003584229 63% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 20.1344086022 139% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 79.6757482053 48.9658058833 163% => OK
Chars per sentence: 127.384615385 100.406767564 127% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.4615384615 20.6045352989 138% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.0 5.45110844103 147% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 6.0 5.5376344086 108% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 11.8709677419 67% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.284788309185 0.236089414692 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.109596642423 0.076458572812 143% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0856251637567 0.0737576698707 116% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.183205872445 0.150856017488 121% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0734245979987 0.0645574589148 114% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.9 11.7677419355 118% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 59.98 58.1214874552 103% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.8 10.1575268817 116% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.0 10.9000537634 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.16 8.01818996416 89% => OK
difficult_words: 50.0 86.8835125448 58% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 10.0537634409 131% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.247311828 137% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 68.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.