Some parent offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school.Do you think this is a good idea?

Essay topics:

Some parent offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school.
Do you think this is a good idea?

Never before in the history has the problem of education been such salient today. Since people treat education much more important, parents are likely to create some new methods to encourage their children to become more passionate about study. Some parents give students money as a reward for getting high mark in the school. I contend that give money as a reward is a good choice.

To begin with, giving monetary rewards can stimulate students’ interest in learning. After students buckling down to the learning and achieve a ideal grade, giving them a pecuniary reward provides them with a sense of accomplishment directly of money can give children more motivation for learning. Thus, it boots the effect of study. My cousin is an excellent example. When he gets high marks or makes significant progress, my uncle encourages him in the way of giving him some money. For the reward, he spends more time of study math the weakness of him. In this case of an endeavor that taking extra two hours to stay math, his grade of math, his grade of math gets a very impressive progress.

In addition, students receive the rewards of money after they get a high marks can help them make a habit of thrift. This reward needs the students pay effort to get and if they are not try their best to learn that will lose the chance to achieve the money. This experience can let them know that no pains, no gains. Therefore, they will not as the students who don’t know this point to spend money without stint. Emilia, my classmate, is a case in point. She always runs out her all money in the beginning of the month so that she has to borrow money for eating. This behave bring trouble to her and her classmate. Besides, with the consciousness , it will be a good chance to parents to teach them how to give money and financing. The benefits of financing are also considerable. For example, to develop the ability of investment, when they come upon the stage, they can arrange their wage better.

Judging from what I’ve mentioned above, I reinforce my idea that it is good for parents to grand their children money as reward for getting high mark in school.

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Average: 6.6 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 1, Rule ID: ADVERB_WORD_ORDER[1]
Message: The adverb 'Never' is usually not used at the beginning of a sentence.
Never before in the history has the problem o...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 148, Rule ID: EN_A_VS_AN
Message: Use 'an' instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
Suggestion: an
...ckling down to the learning and achieve a ideal grade, giving them a pecuniary re...
^
Line 3, column 675, Rule ID: A_UNCOUNTABLE[5]
Message: Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply 'very impressive progress'.
Suggestion: very impressive progress
...s grade of math, his grade of math gets a very impressive progress. In addition, students receive the r...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 653, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...assmate. Besides, with the consciousness , it will be a good chance to parents to ...
^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, if, so, therefore, thus, as to, for example, in addition, to begin with

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 15.1003584229 60% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 9.8082437276 82% => OK
Conjunction : 5.0 13.8261648746 36% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 9.0 11.0286738351 82% => OK
Pronoun: 47.0 43.0788530466 109% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 52.1666666667 105% => OK
Nominalization: 7.0 8.0752688172 87% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1786.0 1977.66487455 90% => OK
No of words: 381.0 407.700716846 93% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.68766404199 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.41805628031 4.48103885553 99% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.46736879579 2.67179642975 92% => OK
Unique words: 200.0 212.727598566 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.524934383202 0.524837075471 100% => OK
syllable_count: 548.1 618.680645161 89% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 16.0 9.59856630824 167% => OK
Interrogative: 2.0 0.994623655914 201% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.94265232975 142% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 20.6003584229 107% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 20.1344086022 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 46.4836237048 48.9658058833 95% => OK
Chars per sentence: 81.1818181818 100.406767564 81% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.3181818182 20.6045352989 84% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.90909090909 5.45110844103 72% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.335144425801 0.236089414692 142% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0922789941588 0.076458572812 121% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.106403670488 0.0737576698707 144% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.246626393729 0.150856017488 163% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0919239190059 0.0645574589148 142% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 9.3 11.7677419355 79% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 71.14 58.1214874552 122% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 7.6 10.1575268817 75% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.63 10.9000537634 88% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.17 8.01818996416 89% => OK
difficult_words: 65.0 86.8835125448 75% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.0537634409 88% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:

para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.

So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:

reasons == advantages or

reasons == disadvantages

for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.

or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.


Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.