Some young adults want independence from their parents as soon as possible. Other young adults prefer to live with their family for a longer time. Which of these solutions do you think is better? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.
I think young adults should experience living independently as soon as they’re old enough because children tend to overlook the importance of family within the comfort zone where they are protected by parents. I believe living away from parents can lead to three benefits for children and their families: helping children to become more independent, to be more supportive of others, and to strengthen family bonds.
First, living independently allows young adults to become more independent and self-reliant through experiencing hardships without relying on their parents’ supports. Once young adults start living away from their parents, young people need to take care of themselves by doing housework as well as working. They can learn not only how to manage their time but also how to save money to support their living by making decisions on their own. Those life skills are not usually taught in schools, and they need to learn through living outside of their comfort zones.
Second, young adults who started living independently are more likely to realize how much they’ve been dependent on their parents, which inspires them to be more appreciative and supportive of their family. From my experience, I’ve never lived away from my parents until I went to college. I started to live in the dorm, and the new environment forced me to realize I had taken granted for my parents’ support. I came to understand that my mom’s cooked meal was the best since I had only options to eat at my school’s cafeteria or to cook by myself. Therefore, I asked my mom to teach me how to cook during the summer, and started to help my mom with housework.
Third, the family bonds will be stronger by the young adults who become more supportive of their family. Young adults can be more mature and supportive of their families after they experienced financial difficulties and hardships in their independent livings. The sense of gratitude for their parents leads young adults to contribute to their families. Through repaying the gratitude that parents have worked hard to raise them, young adults can form stronger bonds with their families.
In conclusion, I think living independently enables young adults to grow and to build stronger connections with the family. The family should be supportive of each other, and I believe the independent living of young adults can be a good opportunity to teach them valuable lessons for creating a harmonious relationship in the family.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 667, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... started to help my mom with housework. Third, the family bonds will be stronger...
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Line 7, column 491, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...orm stronger bonds with their families. In conclusion, I think living independen...
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Line 9, column 337, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... harmonious relationship in the family.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, look, second, so, then, therefore, third, well, i think, in conclusion, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 6.0 11.0286738351 54% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 49.0 43.0788530466 114% => OK
Preposition: 69.0 52.1666666667 132% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2087.0 1977.66487455 106% => OK
No of words: 408.0 407.700716846 100% => OK
Chars per words: 5.11519607843 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.49433085973 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73365854361 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 195.0 212.727598566 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.477941176471 0.524837075471 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 625.5 618.680645161 101% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 9.59856630824 94% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 5.0 1.86738351254 268% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 40.498024216 48.9658058833 83% => OK
Chars per sentence: 122.764705882 100.406767564 122% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.0 20.6045352989 116% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.11764705882 5.45110844103 112% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.5376344086 54% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 16.0 11.8709677419 135% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.398266428149 0.236089414692 169% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.157911182503 0.076458572812 207% => Sentence topic similarity is high.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0790045404993 0.0737576698707 107% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.251619036891 0.150856017488 167% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0670292420151 0.0645574589148 104% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 11.7677419355 125% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 55.58 58.1214874552 96% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 10.1575268817 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.71 10.9000537634 117% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.69 8.01818996416 96% => OK
difficult_words: 74.0 86.8835125448 85% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.247311828 117% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 66.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 20.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.