Advertising is the major method that uses by the companies in order to raise their profits. while some commercials are reliable and showing the truth, others are not. Personally, I believe that most of the commercials, nowadays, enhance the products to a degree that can fool the customers. I feel this way for the following reasons.
To begin with, most of the companies looking for different ways to increase their profits regardless of the methods. they make an advertisement that shows the products better than the reality to attract more people. Fast food restaurants are a compelling example of this. myriads of fast food commercials are broadcasting on the television along the day. They show the sandwich in an attractive way to convince the person to buy that kind of food. So, he will start to think that it is worthy to try it. But in the reality, the food we get in the restaurants is not similar to what we see in the commercials, even though, we still consume it because it tastes delicious.
Secondly, these advertisings focus on the advantages of the products with utter ignorance of the weak points of their product. Taking the phone's commercial as an example; most of the cell phones companies adopted the idea of target advertising. Thus they focus on one feature of the phone in order to attract a certain group of people who assumed to be interested in that particular feature. For instance, when I was a teenager I wanted to buy a phone for the first time. At that period, there was a famous phone that I used to see its commercial everywhere, on the television, billboards, and the internet. The commercial said that the phone can take amazing photographs, thus, it will make our time with friends more enjoyable. Besides, it was colourfull and, in fact, very attractive. Accordingly, I bought it, but unfortunately, although the quality of the camera was really good, the battery was the opposite, it actually was bad and it should be recharged every two hours which was very annoying to me. Thus, these companies increase their sell rate by covering the disadvantages from the audience.
In conclusion, the person should not believe all that he sees on the commercials due to the fact that most of these advertisings enhance the products to an extent that make them differ from the reality.
- TPO-08 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Television advertising directed towards young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 76
- TPO-07 - Integrated Writing Task In an effort to encourage ecologically sustainable forestry practices, an international organization started issuing certifications to wood companies that meet high ecological standards by conserving resources and recyclin 63
- TPO-04 - Integrated Writing Task Endotherms are animals such as modern birds and mammals that keep their body temperatures constant. For instance, humans are endotherms and maintain an internal temperature of 37°C, no matter whether the environment is wa 73
- TPO-17 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Most advertisements make products seem much better then they really are.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 70
- TPO-10 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Playing computer games is a waste of time. Children should not be allowed to play them.Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. 70
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 93, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: While
...panies in order to raise their profits. while some commercials are reliable and showi...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 118, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
...heir profits regardless of the methods. they make an advertisement that shows the pr...
^^^^
Line 3, column 273, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Myriads
...rants are a compelling example of this. myriads of fast food commercials are broadcasti...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 379, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in an attractive way" with adverb for "attractive"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
...n along the day. They show the sandwich in an attractive way to convince the person to buy that kind...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 246, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...adopted the idea of target advertising. Thus they focus on one feature of the phone ...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, actually, besides, but, first, if, look, really, second, secondly, so, still, thus, while, for instance, i feel, in conclusion, in fact, kind of, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 15.1003584229 106% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 13.8261648746 43% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 16.0 11.0286738351 145% => OK
Pronoun: 49.0 43.0788530466 114% => OK
Preposition: 56.0 52.1666666667 107% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1927.0 1977.66487455 97% => OK
No of words: 398.0 407.700716846 98% => OK
Chars per words: 4.84170854271 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.46653527281 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.82169753345 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 211.0 212.727598566 99% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.530150753769 0.524837075471 101% => OK
syllable_count: 592.2 618.680645161 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 20.6003584229 102% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.6772171138 48.9658058833 93% => OK
Chars per sentence: 91.7619047619 100.406767564 91% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.9523809524 20.6045352989 92% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.19047619048 5.45110844103 150% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.5376344086 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.113294476653 0.236089414692 48% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0340834820026 0.076458572812 45% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0405027921125 0.0737576698707 55% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0748953507791 0.150856017488 50% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0123906341318 0.0645574589148 19% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.8 11.7677419355 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 58.1214874552 106% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.79 10.9000537634 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.06 8.01818996416 101% => OK
difficult_words: 89.0 86.8835125448 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 10.002688172 65% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.