TPO6 (independent)
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
Life today is easier and more comfortable than it was when your grandparents were children.
It is a highly debated issue whether or not the living conditions have become more comfortable in comparison to the past and this topic can be approached from several angles due to its importance. Apart from few people who tend to think that our grandparents lived in a simple and intimate environment, almost everyone would agree that today we have the chance of living in a better situation from various aspects. Deeply deliberating over the issue, I believe that our living conditions is going to be more convenient day by day and following discussion reveals my stand and reasoning.
To begin, nowadays internet and other means of communication greatly make us live easier. These help us not only in our daily life for instance searching information, shopping and even studying online, but also definitely have they an effective impact on relationships of people around the world, also positive participation in keeping people in touch with their relatives and friends. To elaborate, life has become much easier, you could call anyone no matter where he or she is, take part in international video conferences and interchange your knowledge with people from long distance.
Other substantial reason that can be taken into consideration is that enhancing new technologies leads to producing a machine for every task, which would have been done by hand in previous times. As a result creating new inventions make a lot of our ordinary works done more feasible and faster. For example a dishwasher helps a household not wash any dish at all, which is not a pleasant task for most of the women.
Last but not least, apparently 50 years ago there were not as many health systems as today neither such medical facilities that we have recently. Regrettably many women would die during their pregnancy, before they would be able to born their babies; moreover many infants were near to death after birth, for the sake of lack of enough hygiene to prevent prevalent diseases. Fortunately, today many of those diseases have a treatment and we are living in safer conditions.
To recapitulate briefly, based on the aforementioned testimonies, I am of opinion that there have been an enhancement in the living conditions since 50 years ago. That is not to say that, of course, that other points of view are completely wrong. However, I think that reasons I provided in favor of my opinion are stronger.
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- TPO22(integrated) 70
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Comments
Thanks to the internet,
Thanks to the internet, nowadays we are able to do many tasks online like shopping, searching information and even studying. It helps us not only in the management of our daily life but also definitely has it an inconsiderable impact on relationships of the people around the world; take its positive participation in keeping people in touch with their relatives and friends throughout the world as an example.
'Not only...but also' is for
'Not only...but also' is for parallel structure.
'Not only A...but also B', A and B should have same structure. If A is a verb/noun, B should be a verb/noun, if A is a sentence, B should be a sentence too.
look at this sentence, after 'but also', there is a complete sentence, but after 'not only, it is 'in the management of our daily life'.
It helps us not only in the management of our daily life but also definitely has it an inconsiderable impact on relationships.
can you re-write this sentence?
It helps us not only in the
It helps us not only in the management of our daily life but also inconsiderably in the improvement of our abroad relationships.
These help us not only in our daily life for instance searching information, shopping and even studying online, but also definitely have they an effective impact
Description: 'Not only...but also' is not used properly. can you re-write this sentence?
from long distance.
from a long distance.
creating new inventions make
creating new inventions makes
before they would be able to born their babies
before they would be able to bear their babies
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 22 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 401 350
No. of Characters: 1954 1500
No. of Different Words: 244 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.475 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.873 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.746 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 127 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 92 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 69 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 49 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.733 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.546 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.303 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.603 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.129 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5