In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies
Discuss the advantage and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this
In the recent years other nations inspire the teenagers to take a year off to have a job or to see the world before pursuing the university degree. In this essay, I will discuss both the positive and negative effects on the people who tend to follow this.
On the positive side, for a child to experience travelling for a year is very fortunate. For the parents who can send their children before going to going degree school is one of a kind. These young people have the opportunity to see the real world and learn from other culture. This is where the teenagers can create their plan for their lives, on what they really want to be in the future. Seeing other countries environment, health and economic issues could inspire the students and find their purpose in life. Furthermore, sending the kinds far from home will build their confidence and survival strategies. Children will become independent as they only live on their own. For some young adults, this is the time to relax and rejuvenate their mind to concentrate further in their studies.
However, some negative results may occur when sending the children for too long, there are plenty of things that could happen in 1 year. For some students who have experienced earning money, they tend to lose focus and no intention of going back to school. These young people will try to prove themselves that they can still find work even not holding a college degree. Others use the time off to get away from family issues instead. Another disadvantage is that the expenses that will shoulder by parents. An amount that could be use to enroll a degree course or for family's basic needs.
To conclude, if the parents can sustain the full year travel before sending off to college is fine. Right guidance with the children is more essential so they will not lose their focus and still pursue their education. Tell the young ones to enjoy and learn from travel journey. For the people who cannot afford to travel, they can work and use what they have learned in the real world.
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flaws:
Sentence Length SD: 4.46 7.5 "Sentence Length SD is low" means that the essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentences varieties wanted.
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.013 0.07
Pay attention to coherence.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 358 350
No. of Characters: 1637 1500
No. of Different Words: 183 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.35 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.573 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.207 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 103 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 65 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 39 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 21 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.9 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.46 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.3 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.279 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.443 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.013 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5