The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australia's share of the Japanese tourist market.
Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below
Chart one point out Japanese tourists travelling abroad in decade. According to diagram about 4.5 millions japanese tourists travelled and we can see it has dramatically increased from 1985 to 1990. It went up approximately 6 millions between 1990and 1985. But amount fell down slightly in 1991. Number of people who travelled abroad were same in 1992 and 1993 and it was nearly 12 millions. For consequence of first chart most number of travellers were in 1995 and almost 15 millions.
In second chart anticipate japanese tourists' percentage who came to Australia in decade. The chart show us so that rising has happened sharply from 1985 to 1989 and being from 1990 to 1994 and also pick point in diagram has accomplished in 1994. However there is at medium and last part of diagram slightly decrease so from 1989 to 1990 and from 1994 to 1995. In result if we compare diagrams quite a few japanese tourist travelled abroad in 1995 and travelled to Australia was about 6.1 percentage of japanese tourists whor toured to abroad.
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Chart one point out
The chart one points out
According to diagram
According to the diagram
In second chart anticipate japanese tourists' percentage who came to Australia in decade.
In the second chart, it anticipates japanese tourists' percentage who came to Australia in a decade.
Sentence: The chart show us so that rising has happened sharply from 1985 to 1989 and being from 1990 to 1994 and also pick point in diagram has accomplished in 1994.
Description: The fragment chart show us is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace show with verb, past tense
Sentence: In result if we compare diagrams quite a few japanese tourist travelled abroad in 1995 and travelled to Australia was about 6.1 percentage of japanese tourists whor toured to abroad.
Error: whor Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
The second chart is not developed well.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 10 10
No. of Words: 176 200
No. of Characters: 843 1000
No. of Different Words: 102 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.642 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.79 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.582 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 61 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 44 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 35 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 17 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.6 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.787 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.4 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.493 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.161 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 2 4