The number of overweight children in developed countries is increasing. Some people think this is due to problems such as the growing number of fast food outlets. Others believe that parents are to blame for not looking after their children's health.
Nowadays one of the most spoken problems is the increased number of obese young people in developed countries. Many people believe that fast food restaurants contribute to this problem since they offer unhealthy and fat food. By contrast, others consider that the increased number of obese children is due to parents who neglect their offsprings' health. In my opinion, there would be less children who are suffering from the excessive weight, if parents paid attention to their children's health properly.
According to World Health Organisation (WHO), the number of obese children in developed countries has significantly increased over the past two decades. It is assumed that there is a link between the increased number of overweight children and the growing number of fast food restaurants since usually the amount of fat in fast foods exceeds the permissible norms of fat. Moreover, hamburgers and fries, which are considered as an unhealthy food, are affordable to population and usually located near educational institutes. Thus, it might seem that the growing number of fast food restaurants are contributing to the increased number of obese people, most of whom are children; nonetheless, there are more significant factors which facilitate individuals, particularly children, to be obese.
Parents who are mainly responsible for their children's health and overall well-being should control their offsprings' diet and lifestyle. If children, for instance, are forbidden strictly to visit fast food restaurants by their parents, the number of children who eat at fast food outlets will be significantly decreased. In addition, parents should encourage their children to lead more active life: doing sport and spending less time in front of a computer, rather than sedentary one.
In conclusion, I absolutely agree with that parents are responsible for the increased number of obese children since they have a significant influence on their children to lead a healthy lifestyle.
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2019-07-03 | Kim Tang | 78 | view |
2019-06-26 | Jerry Turtle | 89 | view |
2019-04-21 | Kamal_7 | 67 | view |
2018-11-16 | Rapunzel | 84 | view |
2018-03-05 | kimloan268 | 89 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
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Nowadays one of the most spoken problems...
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Suggestion: fewer
...; health. In my opinion, there would be less children who are suffering from the exc...
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...heir children's health properly. According to World Health Organisation (...
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...s, particularly children, to be obese. Parents who are mainly responsible for t...
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Suggestion:
... computer, rather than sedentary one. In conclusion, I absolutely agree with t...
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Discourse Markers used:
['but', 'if', 'moreover', 'nonetheless', 'so', 'thus', 'well', 'for instance', 'in addition', 'in conclusion', 'in my opinion']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.252808988764 0.247107548796 102% => OK
Verbs: 0.13202247191 0.15552993741 85% => OK
Adjectives: 0.11797752809 0.0946569551029 125% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0561797752809 0.0501201869031 112% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0365168539326 0.0437536398559 83% => OK
Prepositions: 0.123595505618 0.122223957237 101% => OK
Participles: 0.0393258426966 0.0403219363162 98% => OK
Conjunctions: 3.07954502667 2.80592935109 110% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0280898876404 0.0326786765898 86% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.00163938923432 0% => More particles wanted.
Determiners: 0.0589887640449 0.0861751148067 68% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0140449438202 0.0214082191602 66% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.0196629213483 0.0119246538136 165% => OK
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2027.0 1933.38276553 105% => OK
No of words: 308.0 316.052104208 97% => OK
Chars per words: 6.58116883117 6.10592293882 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.18926351222 4.20519365927 100% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.415584415584 0.37474360046 111% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.334415584416 0.284197041944 118% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.256493506494 0.203843217982 126% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.204545454545 0.137313986986 149% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.07954502667 2.80592935109 110% => OK
Unique words: 161.0 176.041082164 91% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.522727272727 0.560935902166 93% => OK
Word variations: 53.4293496233 60.7401812628 88% => OK
How many sentences: 12.0 16.0911823647 75% => OK
Sentence length: 25.6666666667 20.7725350517 124% => OK
Sentence length SD: 42.4211687198 49.5273876611 86% => OK
Chars per sentence: 168.916666667 93.4120437189 181% => Less chars per sentence wanted.
Words per sentence: 25.6666666667 15.2821509519 168% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.916666666667 0.594174754866 154% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.39078156313 91% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 5.01102204409 100% => OK
Readability: 59.1082251082 49.1922392462 120% => OK
Elegance: 1.85 1.69127372897 109% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.554292803842 0.332604825255 167% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.120437885493 0.102734651613 117% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.0566725942954 0.0668474354756 85% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.598319381396 0.534917948617 112% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.174419907598 0.148666948902 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.249730429476 0.13441755203 186% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.101346214176 0.0742828286743 136% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.398804134913 0.324241079732 123% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.10946643712 0.0640056729886 171% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.379251294459 0.22793763319 166% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.100470940597 0.0582452615562 172% => OK
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 8.68436873747 69% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 3.9879759519 150% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 3.41883767535 0% => More neutral sentences wanted.
Positive topic words: 5.0 5.88977955912 85% => OK
Negative topic words: 6.0 2.60220440882 231% => OK
Neutral topic words: 0.0 2.00200400802 0% => More neutral topic words wanted.
Total topic words: 11.0 10.493987976 105% => OK
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Rates: 78.6516853933 out of 100
Scores by essay E-rater: 7.0 Out of 9