Some young adults want independence from their parents as soon as possible. Other young adults prefer to live with their families for a longer time. Which of these situations do you think is better?
The young adults are the future men and women which draws the picture of the society in the near future. Bringing up our young well by planting inside them the good morals and values will help us improve our society and flourish our country. That is why I believe that young adults have better live with their families for a longer period of time. All of us need the existence of experienced people close to us who can guide us and help us overcome the difficult situations we face in our life. At the same time, our families need our existence in their life to help them and stay in touch with them....
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Comments
Thanks for reply It seems I
Thanks for reply
It seems I made a mistake copying the last two paragraphs. I intended to put the last paragraph as middle not the end. Thanks for comment and rating
Sentence: The other offer was from a governamental university which has a good study curriculum but no activities like the other university.
Error: governamental Suggestion: governmental
Sentence: What if your father or mother is ill? Who will take care of him and give him the medecine in time?
Error: medecine Suggestion: medicine
Sentence: They taught him very bad habbits like smoking and addiction to narcotics.
Error: habbits Suggestion: habits
The last paragraph should be put in the middle of the essay as an example, not in the end. It breaks the structure of the essay.
It is on top list:
http://www.testbig.com/essay-categories/toefl
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 6
Category: Excellent Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 485 350
No. of Characters: 2100 1500
No. of Different Words: 223 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.693 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.33 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.433 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 120 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 80 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 58 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 39 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 19.4 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.794 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.32 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.289 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.481 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.22 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5