Some people believe that when busy parent do not have enough time to spend with their children, the best use of time is to have fun playing games and sports. Others believe that it is best to use that time doing things together that are related to schoolwork. Which do you prefer?
Social scientists have been debating over how children should spend their time when their parents do not have enough time to spend with them. Some believe that they should do their homework or other school materials in order to fortify their knowledge which pave the way to a bright future. From my vantage point, I believe that it is better for children to use that time to have fun playing games or sports because they can fortify their communication skills, and they can also raise their health status.
First and foremost, by spending time playing sports or games with other children, they can learn how to communicate effectively. In our modern era, having a good interaction with others can help us to have a delightful future. Most prosperous and prominent people are really proficient in communication skills. Therefore, by engaging in group activities such as playing basketball, volleyball, and so forth, children can heighten their talents in this scope. Also, recently conducted research in the department of sociology in a prestigious university shows that students playing with their friends have better communication, oral, and verbal skills. Moreover, by playing video games or various sports, children can forget about the absence of their parents. We know that some children may nag about the absence of parents during the day and become vulnerable in the long run, but playing games and having fun can help them forget about this situation. Thus, the more they play in the absence of their parents, the better they can pass the time.
Furthermore, doing sports can help children to have a healthier life. Nowadays, more children are exposed to severe health threats such as obesity, diabetes, respiratory issues, and so on. Due to dormancy, many children became obese and posed themselves in great health risks. Also, because of air pollution some children are become susceptible to lung problems. As a result, we should entice our children to participate in playing sports to help them become healthier. Having a healthier body can also help them to learn things much faster. A famous proverb in my country, Iran, says that "a healthy mind can only be found in a healthy body". Therefore, it is better for children to allocate a suitable amount of time doing exercise. Consequently, should children assign enough time playing energetic sports, they will become physically and mentally healthy. Hence, not only can they become healthier, they can also become happier.
All in all, although some people may believe that spending enough time in reading or doing home assignments have a lot of merits, I strongly believe that just sticking to studying is not bring about positive results. Can we have a good life without being healthy? Don't we need some time to play and have fun?
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2019-03-17 | Peyman Safapour | 73 | view |
- Integrated writing (TPO 49) 73
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Because the modern life is very complex, it is essential for young people to have the ability to plan and organize. 73
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? A person should not make an important decision alone. 70
- Integrated writing (TPO 48) 85
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Because people are busy doing so many different things, they do very few things well. 70
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 188, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'brought'.
Suggestion: brought
...e that just sticking to studying is not bring about positive results. Can we have a g...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 264, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: Don't
...have a good life without being healthy? Dont we need some time to play and have fun?...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, furthermore, hence, if, may, moreover, really, so, therefore, thus, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 9.0 15.1003584229 60% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 22.0 9.8082437276 224% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 17.0 13.8261648746 123% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 47.0 43.0788530466 109% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 52.1666666667 105% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 8.0752688172 124% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2348.0 1977.66487455 119% => OK
No of words: 462.0 407.700716846 113% => OK
Chars per words: 5.08225108225 4.8611393121 105% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.63618218583 4.48103885553 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59110347291 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 228.0 212.727598566 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.493506493506 0.524837075471 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 701.1 618.680645161 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 4.0 3.08781362007 130% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 3.51792114695 85% => OK
Conjunction: 5.0 1.86738351254 268% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 19.0 20.1344086022 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.8466880312 48.9658058833 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 97.8333333333 100.406767564 97% => OK
Words per sentence: 19.25 20.6045352989 93% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.0 5.45110844103 92% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 20.0 11.8709677419 168% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.85842293907 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.88709677419 20% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.391763100613 0.236089414692 166% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.120323781111 0.076458572812 157% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0972871579027 0.0737576698707 132% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.285518276697 0.150856017488 189% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.100428684861 0.0645574589148 156% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.1 11.7677419355 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 60.65 58.1214874552 104% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.5 10.1575268817 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.18 10.9000537634 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.03 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 101.0 86.8835125448 116% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 10.002688172 130% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.6 10.0537634409 95% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 10.247311828 127% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.