"The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition."
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Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
In this current world, competition is always emphasized more than cooperation in various fields. Therefore many leaders in many companies, government and industries are mostly the people who have won many competitions. However, when we look at people who are truely accepted as nice leaders, they are generally good at cooperating.
First, leaders are people who lead groups of people, not the one who competes with others alone. Since there aren't any leader who can compete all by themselve, they always need help from their close teammates. For example, in business, people might assume that good mangers are ones who compete with other mangers aggressively. However in reality, their primary concerns are how to lead their teammates more efficiently, which shows cooperation is the basis of competing with others better. In this sense, cooperation is what we need to compete well.
Second, in this society, we can see many negative consequences of selectinig students to prestigious universities, which claim that they are growing future leaders. They choose students by how competitively they lived in high school, but they don't see any other factors such as how they have cooperated with their classmates. For example, many students at Harvard university were caught after cheating for their test few years ago. This shows they are good at competing but not many people will follow them. Because they only know how to compete other students in their lectures, but they don't know how to respect others' effort, which they had to learn from cooperation.
Third, because many society already have emphasized a lot on competition but almost none to cooperation, it is time to teach students how to cooperate with others. In schools, students who are thought as nice leaders by friends are often misconstrued as students who hang out too much or are trouble makers to teachers. However, getting respects from other classmates is also important ability just as knowing how to take SAT. Therefore, we have to stop making those who know how to cooperate compete, we have to teach who only knows how to compete how to cooperate.
In conclusion, I agree that competition is important in modern society, However, I think we have to teach young people how to cooperate because cooperation is the foundation to compete better, there have been many negative consequences because of growing students who only know competition, and we have been neglecting importance of cooperation at schools.
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- According to a recent report by our marketing department, during the past year, fewer people attended Super Screen produced movies than in any other year. And yet the percentage of positive reviews by movie reviewers about specific Super Screen movies act 47
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 98, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Therefore,
...ore than cooperation in various fields. Therefore many leaders in many companies, governm...
^^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 252, Rule ID: WHO_NOUN[1]
Message: A noun should not follow "who". Try changing to a verb or maybe to 'who is a are'.
Suggestion: who is a are
...itions. However, when we look at people who are truely accepted as nice leaders, they a...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 109, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: aren't
...competes with others alone. Since there arent any leader who can compete all by thems...
^^^^^
Line 2, column 328, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...ompete with other mangers aggressively. However in reality, their primary concerns are ...
^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 86, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...tive consequences of selectinig students to prestigious universities, which claim...
^^
Line 3, column 244, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...ely they lived in high school, but they dont see any other factors such as how they ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 590, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...er students in their lectures, but they dont know how to respect others effort, whic...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, look, second, so, therefore, third, well, for example, i think, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 21.0 19.5258426966 108% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 12.4196629213 48% => OK
Conjunction : 7.0 14.8657303371 47% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.3162921348 159% => OK
Pronoun: 36.0 33.0505617978 109% => OK
Preposition: 56.0 58.6224719101 96% => OK
Nominalization: 14.0 12.9106741573 108% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2083.0 2235.4752809 93% => OK
No of words: 403.0 442.535393258 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.16873449132 5.05705443957 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48049772903 4.55969084622 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.7551292105 2.79657885939 99% => OK
Unique words: 198.0 215.323595506 92% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.491315136476 0.4932671777 100% => OK
syllable_count: 649.8 704.065955056 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 6.24550561798 176% => OK
Article: 0.0 4.99550561798 0% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.10617977528 129% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.77640449438 169% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.38483146067 160% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.2370786517 89% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 23.0359550562 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 61.7825987328 60.3974514979 102% => OK
Chars per sentence: 115.722222222 118.986275619 97% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.3888888889 23.4991977007 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.27777777778 5.21951772744 120% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 7.0 7.80617977528 90% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 10.2758426966 107% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.13820224719 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.83258426966 62% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.0785573312432 0.243740707755 32% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0320095322888 0.0831039109588 39% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0280447221928 0.0758088955206 37% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0461110408221 0.150359130593 31% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0256604009788 0.0667264976115 38% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.1 14.1392134831 100% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 48.8420337079 101% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.1743820225 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.0 12.1639044944 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.06 8.38706741573 96% => OK
difficult_words: 85.0 100.480337079 85% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 11.8971910112 71% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.2143820225 96% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.7820224719 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.