Claim: Even though young people often receive the advice to “follow your dreams,” more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals.
Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfish.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim AND the reason on which that claim is based.
Young minds are full of ideas and often devoid of the financial and social reality. They have the courage to become iconoclastic and dream about doing something different. The matter of contention here is that whether they should be more encouraged to follow their dreams or be forced to pick a goal for them by the society for which the society consider him worthy. Followings one's dream can realize into more contribution in the society rather than forcing something apparently worthy goals for that person.
If we look at the some economically underdeveloped countries like India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, vocational studies are of much priority there. The main is reason is that getting a job after graduating is the primary goal there because of the financial situation. Most of the parents want to see their offsprings succeed and become financially independent and stable. And in light of the economic condition in those coutries the vocational skills become more relevant. But not every one wants to be a doctor or engineer. One might have the dream of learning and performing arts. Forcing him into learning a trade in which one is not intersted might result adversely. If we consider the famous names in sport from this nations, if they had been forced to pursue different career in light of their economical situation, they could have been nipped in the bud.
Also, there are so many inspiring stories of people succeeding following their dreams and becoming a valuable additiong to their society. Lets talk about the paraolympics, those physically disabled athletes fighting so many barriers of which physical dissabilities are the least. But they are still pursuing their dreams inspite of the ideal defition of their worthiness which is being physically perfect. The young minds are full of energy and ideas. If they are let to follow their dreams they will be encouraged to give their very best and will contribute in the society more profoundly.
The reason behind the claim was to that most people only have dreams that serve their purpose. This is true that most people are selfish. But when it comes to deciding about a persons life what is the standard to call one's dream to selfish? Every person should have the right to decide his fate. And again in the claim it was stated that more emphasis should be given on picking worthy goals. How can we set worthy goals for a person? There is established criteria for that. Many policies have been developed to check aptitude for particular jobs. Although they might be useful to some extent but they are not the golden standard. As Einstein famously said, that one cant judge a snail by its ability to climb a tree. thus we shouyld not also forcegoals on other people.
As the Indian prime minister Abul Kalam famously said, dream is that what does not let a person sleep. By following a dream, one can actually work in their field of interest and make valuable contribution rather than being forced with something. All men is for himself. But if we let young minds to follow their dreams even this apparent selfish dreams can enrich the germane field and add contribution in the society.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2020-01-09 | Mridul | 50 | view |
| 2019-12-02 | Opak Pulu | 50 | view |
| 2019-10-31 | solankis304 | 58 | view |
| 2019-10-25 | psalasiya | 50 | view |
| 2019-10-14 | Siddhivinayak Shanbhagd | 75 | view |
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- TOEFL TPO 43 - Integrated Writing Task 73
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 380, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...ociety consider him worthy. Followings ones dream can realize into more contributio...
^^^^
Line 3, column 19, Rule ID: THE_SOME_DAY[1]
Message: Did you mean 'same'?
Suggestion: same
...s for that person. If we look at the some economically underdeveloped countries l...
^^^^
Line 3, column 668, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...not intersted might result adversely. If we consider the famous names in sport fr...
^^
Line 3, column 713, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...consider the famous names in sport from this nations, if they had been forced to pur...
^^^^
Line 3, column 796, Rule ID: ECONOMICAL_ECONOMIC[1]
Message: Did you mean 'economic' (=connected with economy)?
Suggestion: economic
...rsue different career in light of their economical situation, they could have been nipped ...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 139, Rule ID: LETS_LET[1]
Message: Did you mean 'Let's'?
Suggestion: Let's
... a valuable additiong to their society. Lets talk about the paraolympics, those phys...
^^^^
Line 7, column 177, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
.... But when it comes to deciding about a persons life what is the standard to call ones ...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 668, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...rd. As Einstein famously said, that one cant judge a snail by its ability to climb a...
^^^^
Line 7, column 719, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Thus
...a snail by its ability to climb a tree. thus we shouyld not also forcegoals on other...
^^^^
Line 7, column 719, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: thus,
...a snail by its ability to climb a tree. thus we shouyld not also forcegoals on other...
^^^^
Line 9, column 255, Rule ID: AGREEMENT_SENT_START[4]
Message: You should probably use: 'are'.
Suggestion: are
...an being forced with something. All men is for himself. But if we let young minds ...
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, apparently, but, if, look, so, still, thus, as to
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 33.0 19.5258426966 169% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.4196629213 105% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 14.8657303371 135% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 11.3162921348 133% => OK
Pronoun: 49.0 33.0505617978 148% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 60.0 58.6224719101 102% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 12.9106741573 62% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2627.0 2235.4752809 118% => OK
No of words: 536.0 442.535393258 121% => OK
Chars per words: 4.90111940299 5.05705443957 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.81161862636 4.55969084622 106% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.52159240189 2.79657885939 90% => OK
Unique words: 266.0 215.323595506 124% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.496268656716 0.4932671777 101% => OK
syllable_count: 806.4 704.065955056 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59117977528 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 6.24550561798 80% => OK
Article: 4.0 4.99550561798 80% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 3.10617977528 225% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 6.0 1.77640449438 338% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 1.0 4.38483146067 23% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 32.0 20.2370786517 158% => OK
Sentence length: 16.0 23.0359550562 69% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 43.3299477844 60.3974514979 72% => OK
Chars per sentence: 82.09375 118.986275619 69% => OK
Words per sentence: 16.75 23.4991977007 71% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.03125 5.21951772744 39% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 11.0 7.80617977528 141% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 18.0 10.2758426966 175% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 5.13820224719 97% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.83258426966 186% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.196745010612 0.243740707755 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0513910626022 0.0831039109588 62% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0504765702277 0.0758088955206 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.118106696128 0.150359130593 79% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0454157542624 0.0667264976115 68% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.0 14.1392134831 71% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 63.7 48.8420337079 130% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.92365168539 39% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 8.4 12.1743820225 69% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.84 12.1639044944 89% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.91 8.38706741573 94% => OK
difficult_words: 118.0 100.480337079 117% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 11.8971910112 97% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.4 11.2143820225 75% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 11.7820224719 68% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.