In 1992, many farmers in Jalikistan began using a hormone designed to produce larger cows that would produce more milk. Since then, childhood obesity in Jalikistan has grown by 200 percent. The amount of milk and dairy consumed by children in this area has not increased or decreased. Children in the same area who are lactose intolerant, and who drink almond milk or soy milk, have not had the same increase in childhood obesity. The only clear explanation is that the introduction of the hormone is responsible for the increase in childhood obesity in that area.
Write a response in which you discuss one or more viable alternatives to the proposed explanation. Justify, with support, why the alternatives could rival the proposed explanation and explain how those explanation(s) can plausibly account for the facts presented in the argument.
Explanation of increase in childhood obesity provided by author is cogent. The author statement is also vague as it does not signify any proper evidence on the implication of his study. As stated in the author's statement, the farmers in Jalikistan began using a hormone which have ability to produce large cows which helped them to increase their milk production and hence revenue. It is no clear theory behind the usage of artificial hormone. There is no answer to the question whether the hormone used over cows can be used over humans too.
Obesity is a baneful disease which can be occur to any living being and it can be an implication of various ill habits or some virus. There are various ill habits written in science journals which can cause severe obesity. Milk and dairy products increase the lactose content in living being. whole milk can also increase fat content of the body but it is not evident that the children of Jalikistan are suffering from obesity due to hormone intake. As per stated by author that the amount of consumption of dairy products has not increase or decreased, there is no such validity of the survey. Is the survey was conducted including the complete village or comprised of only affected people?
Survey conducted resulted in 200 percent increase in childhood obesity. This simply implies that the number of children affected with obesity has increase three folds. If we trust the survey, there can be a case of misuse of hormone. But the next statement where author said that the children who are lactose intolerant are not affected with obesity, contradicts this. The illiterate farmers will try to consume the hormone in situation when their child is lactose intolerant. Author's statement strengthens our explanation.
Advancement in technology has been in progress since years. In 1992, farmers employed such hormones which can increase their milk yield. There was always been lack of literacy in farms during 1992 period which might have caused farmers to use the same hormones for their children but that hormone ended up side effecting in return. Government should take their observation over such cases where such baneful diseases are increasing three fold.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2019-12-21 | yswang | 55 | view |
| 2019-11-23 | yswang | 49 | view |
| 2019-09-12 | dpn1102 | 36 | view |
| 2019-09-04 | Krishna Prasad | 33 | view |
| 2019-08-11 | lalitarora97 | 50 | view |
- As people rely more and more on technology to solve problems, the ability of humans to think for themselves will surely deteriorate. 50
- In 1992, many farmers in Jalikistan began using a hormone designed to produce larger cows that would produce more milk. Since then, childhood obesity in Jalikistan has grown by 200 percent. The amount of milk and dairy consumed by children in this area ha 50
Comments
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 366 350
No. of Characters: 1813 1500
No. of Different Words: 193 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.374 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.954 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.468 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 139 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 105 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 65 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 33 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.3 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.764 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.3 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.302 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.476 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.102 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 204, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[2]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...lication of his study. As stated in the authors statement, the farmers in Jalikistan be...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 467, Rule ID: WHETHER[5]
Message: Can you shorten this phrase to just 'whether', or rephrase the sentence to avoid "the question"?
Suggestion: whether
...tificial hormone. There is no answer to the question whether the hormone used over cows can be used ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 294, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Whole
...se the lactose content in living being. whole milk can also increase fat content of t...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 532, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: 'increased'.
Suggestion: increased
...f consumption of dairy products has not increase or decreased, there is no such validity...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 294, Rule ID: WHO_NOUN[1]
Message: A noun should not follow "who". Try changing to a verb or maybe to 'who is a are'.
Suggestion: who is a are
...ent where author said that the children who are lactose intolerant are not affected wit...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, hence, if, so, then
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 19.6327345309 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 13.6137724551 110% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 28.8173652695 69% => OK
Preposition: 47.0 55.5748502994 85% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1849.0 2260.96107784 82% => OK
No of words: 366.0 441.139720559 83% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.05191256831 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.37391431897 4.56307096286 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.51273593092 2.78398813304 90% => OK
Unique words: 191.0 204.123752495 94% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.521857923497 0.468620217663 111% => OK
syllable_count: 588.6 705.55239521 83% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 2.0 4.96107784431 40% => OK
Article: 3.0 8.76447105788 34% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 21.0 19.7664670659 106% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 41.2390300125 57.8364921388 71% => OK
Chars per sentence: 88.0476190476 119.503703932 74% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.4285714286 23.324526521 75% => OK
Discourse Markers: 1.42857142857 5.70786347227 25% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 5.15768463074 78% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 5.0 5.25449101796 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 6.88822355289 131% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.223476874092 0.218282227539 102% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0621764017635 0.0743258471296 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0620887951065 0.0701772020484 88% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.134103303028 0.128457276422 104% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0305615206574 0.0628817314937 49% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 11.1 14.3799401198 77% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 48.3550499002 112% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.71 12.5979740519 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.28 8.32208582834 99% => OK
difficult_words: 88.0 98.500998004 89% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 12.3882235529 69% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.