Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea?
In the preceding decades, parents have always strived to encourage their children to study better in schools owing to its pivotal role in the prosperity of individuals. The ever-increasing prominence of education's quality has aroused the longstanding controversy as to whether parents should offer their children money for every high grade they obtain or not. Although many people adhere to the idea that offering money to children is not a good idea since this approach makes them greedy, I resolutely possess the conviction that parents should encourage their children with giving money to them. In the following paragraphs, the most outstanding reasons will be explicated.
The first reason that substantiates/supports my perspective is concerned with the fact that offering money to students for getting a high grade is the best approach to motivate them to study better. In fact, when parents employ this method students will set a short-term goal for themselves to get a high grade in the next exam too. This process of striving for receiving a high mark brings about the high quality of education. Take a personal experience as an example, when I was ten years old and studying in an elementary school, I was not a top student. I would invariably get modest grades, for there was no encouragement for me to endeavor to get a good mark. After a while, my parents decided to give me money for every high mark that I attained. This was a turning point in my life, from that moment I decided to make every endeavor for obtaining a high grade. I would always study intensively to be the top student in every class which resulted in going to a decent university in later life. Had my parents not encouraged me to get a high grade, I would not have been able to study in that decent university. As a rule, the quality of education is closely correlated with motivation.
Another noteworthy point to be mentioned is that students will learn how to manage their money when they receive money from their parents. Indeed, this method of encouraging students offers them a pragmatic approach to learn how they should expend their money. Some superficial parents contend that they should not give money directly to their children since this approach makes them greedy. These parents should consider the fact that not only does offering money to children not make them greedy, but it also trains them how to spend it efficiently. A relevant study which was conducted in Germany indicates that people who had the experience of using money and allocating their budget in their childhood are more successful in business than their counterparts who did not have that experience. This result is probably attributed to the fact that these people have learned how to invest their finance in different projects from their childhood experiences of utilizing money.
In brief, contemplating all the aforementioned reasons leads us to the conclusion that offering money to students for attaining a high grade is an excellent approach due to its productive effect on motivating students and teaching them how to expend their money. It is highly recommended that psychologists conduct a thorough study on the effect of various methods of encouraging students and inform parents since the greater wisdom parents have regarding this issue, the better/more they are likely to employ these methods. Failing to do so will definitely sow the seeds of ignorance.
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- Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea? 73
- Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school. Do you think this is a good idea? 73
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 264, Rule ID: WHETHER[6]
Message: Can you shorten this phrase to just 'whether', or rephrase the sentence to avoid "as to"?
Suggestion: whether
...as aroused the longstanding controversy as to whether parents should offer their children mon...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, regarding, so, while, as to, in brief, in fact
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 13.8261648746 43% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 22.0 11.0286738351 199% => OK
Pronoun: 74.0 43.0788530466 172% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 75.0 52.1666666667 144% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 8.0752688172 136% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2874.0 1977.66487455 145% => OK
No of words: 571.0 407.700716846 140% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.03327495622 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.88831323574 4.48103885553 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.84168193013 2.67179642975 106% => OK
Unique words: 258.0 212.727598566 121% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.451838879159 0.524837075471 86% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 890.1 618.680645161 144% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 20.1344086022 119% => OK
Sentence length SD: 58.7908728433 48.9658058833 120% => OK
Chars per sentence: 124.956521739 100.406767564 124% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.8260869565 20.6045352989 120% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.95652173913 5.45110844103 54% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 3.85842293907 104% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.39577700964 0.236089414692 168% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.120130024317 0.076458572812 157% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0685116816773 0.0737576698707 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.251098901649 0.150856017488 166% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0599263504116 0.0645574589148 93% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 11.7677419355 125% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 58.1214874552 81% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 10.1575268817 125% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.19 10.9000537634 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.59 8.01818996416 107% => OK
difficult_words: 136.0 86.8835125448 157% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 10.002688172 140% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.0537634409 115% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 73.3333333333 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 22.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.