The following appeared in a memo from the Mayor of the city of Hillview:
“In order to alleviate the serious unemployment problem in our town, we should encourage Autotech to build its automobile manufacturing plant in our area. The Hillview landfill, which has been undeveloped for decades, is a perfect site for this plant. The building and staffing of this plant will put to work thousands of Hillview residents left unemployed after Computech computer software programming company abandoned its national facility last year. I am asking the City Council to authorize a large campaign to attract the company and offer significant tax incentives to make our town attractive to this giant of car manufacturing.”
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The argument that, in order to manage the unemployment rate in Hillview, a promotional campaign about the area should be done to incentive the construction of Autotech' car industry, may seem reasonable at first glance. However, before implementing this policy the Mayor of Hillview needs to address some questions to provide further and stronger evidence to his argument.
The argument that, in order to manage the unemployment rate in Hillview, a promotional campaign about the area should be done to incentive the construction of Autotech' car industry, may seem reasonable at first glance. However, before implementing this policy the Mayor of Hillview needs to address some questions to provide further and stronger evidence to his argument.
First, the Mayor is strongly convinced that the landfill around his city is the perfect place to build an industry. This could be a good point to persuade the company but without a pratical explaination it will not be taken in consideration. For this reason, in order to be more persuasive, the Mayor should provide scientific data which support his assumption. Suppose, for instance, that Hillview's area is full of source of green energy. In this case the company would be much more prone to choose it as a site for the factory.
Second, the Mayor should answer why he is that convinced that Autotech after having built their factory in Hillview, is going to hire local employees. As a matter of fact no clear evidence about thta is reported in the memo and, if local people will remain unemployed the initial problem would not be solved. For this reason, the Mayor must clearify whether he has already estabilish some rules with the automobile company concerning the hiring of local people and, in the case he has not done it yet, it would necessary to start doing it.
All this add to the fact that the Mayor has not made any comparison between the cost needed for the advertisiment campaign and the future benefits that would be gained from the hire of local employees. For this reason, before the policy implementation, the Mayor should be required to answer some questions regarding the economics consequences of the campaign.
In conclusion, before the policy will be implemented many questions have to be adressed by the Major. First, more information about the area should be given to the company investors in order to make the area seem more attractive and to depict it as the perfect place to build the fatory. In addition, he has to clarify whether some benefits to hire local people has been provided to the company or not, and in the last case it would be wise to do it. Last, the relationship between the cost of the campaign and its future economics benefits should be clearified in order to understand whether this investiment would be reasonable. Only when all this question will have an answer, the campaign should be started.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 430 350
No. of Characters: 2046 1500
No. of Different Words: 192 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.554 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.758 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.598 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 140 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 100 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 73 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 41 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25.294 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.984 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.647 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.338 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.558 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.107 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, may, regarding, second, so, as to, for instance, in addition, in conclusion, as a matter of fact
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.6327345309 112% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 20.0 12.9520958084 154% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 33.0 28.8173652695 115% => OK
Preposition: 62.0 55.5748502994 112% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2101.0 2260.96107784 93% => OK
No of words: 430.0 441.139720559 97% => OK
Chars per words: 4.88604651163 5.12650576532 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55372829156 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68032209909 2.78398813304 96% => OK
Unique words: 197.0 204.123752495 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.458139534884 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 652.5 705.55239521 92% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 4.96107784431 81% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.70958083832 185% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 9.0 4.22255489022 213% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 19.7664670659 86% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 22.8473053892 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 45.3450439451 57.8364921388 78% => OK
Chars per sentence: 123.588235294 119.503703932 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.2941176471 23.324526521 108% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.11764705882 5.70786347227 125% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 5.0 4.67664670659 107% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.159107145007 0.218282227539 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0615009136247 0.0743258471296 83% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0433864181504 0.0701772020484 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.103127820594 0.128457276422 80% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0346502767782 0.0628817314937 55% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.2 14.3799401198 99% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 54.56 48.3550499002 113% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.38 12.5979740519 90% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.11 8.32208582834 97% => OK
difficult_words: 88.0 98.500998004 89% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.1389221557 108% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 58.33 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.5 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.