A university has money in its budget to do one thing to improve its facilities for students. It can either improve the quality of the technology (for example: computers and printers) that it provides for students. Or it can redesign spaces where students hold club meetings and gather with friends in their spare time to make these areas more comfortable and appealing. Which idea do you prefer and why?
In the modern world, the universities have been changing in their technologies, their educational systems, and also reforming their buildings and campuses. So indispensable is for universities, that they should know how to spend their budget. The controversial question which arises here is that it is better for universities to pay money for redesigning of spaces or improving the technological systems. As far As I am concerned, I prefer the changing spaces of buildings and campuses. I elaborate on my reasons in the following paragraphs.
The first reason I want to point out is that nowadays students have their own computers and occasionally use the computers of the university. It would be an asset to students, if the university improves its computers, but students use their laptops instead of those computers. Hence, it can be an extra cost for the university to waste its budget to update the quality of its technologies. In addition, students use the university's computers and printers just for simple and short tasks, so former computers and printers are good enough to perform their works. Accordingly, I believe that updating will be unusable and the university can pay its money for other beneficial things. If I were the rector of the university, I would spend the budget on changing the space of the university.
The second reason is that redesigning spaces where students use them frequently brings about increasing the level of the university's rank. These meetings, finally, render the new ideas and new ideas create innovative productions that can promote the scientific prestige of the university. Moreover, those meetings which happen out of buildings always are more advantageous than meetings in a close space, and this is because of the fact that there are fresh air and natural light out of buildings which make the students less exhausted. As an example, in our university, one of the professors gives his lectures in the yard of the university, because he thinks that in the open spaces, the learning ability of students is more.
All in all, Should the universities want to make a great impact on the efficiency of students, they need to spend their budgets on improving the design of spaces, because the students don't need new computers but they need new spaces that they are living in them every day. The top universities always have especial campuses and buildings and it is a witness for my perspective.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 417, Rule ID: BECAUSE_OF_THE_FACT_THAT[1]
Message: This phrase is redundant. Use simply 'because'.
Suggestion: because
... meetings in a close space, and this is because of the fact that there are fresh air and natural light o...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 185, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
... design of spaces, because the students dont need new computers but they need new sp...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, also, but, finally, first, hence, if, moreover, second, so, in addition
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 15.1003584229 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 47.0 43.0788530466 109% => OK
Preposition: 42.0 52.1666666667 81% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.0752688172 25% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2040.0 1977.66487455 103% => OK
No of words: 403.0 407.700716846 99% => OK
Chars per words: 5.06203473945 4.8611393121 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48049772903 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.9496531648 2.67179642975 110% => OK
Unique words: 193.0 212.727598566 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.478908188586 0.524837075471 91% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 639.0 618.680645161 103% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 6.0 3.08781362007 194% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.86738351254 161% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 54.5112286455 48.9658058833 111% => OK
Chars per sentence: 120.0 100.406767564 120% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.7058823529 20.6045352989 115% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.94117647059 5.45110844103 91% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 11.8709677419 84% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.373524871565 0.236089414692 158% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.114653568501 0.076458572812 150% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0868146386109 0.0737576698707 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.20946817118 0.150856017488 139% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0966886356587 0.0645574589148 150% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.3 11.7677419355 122% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 58.1214874552 83% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.1575268817 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.36 10.9000537634 113% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.99 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 82.0 86.8835125448 94% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 10.002688172 90% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.