"A ten-year nationwide study of the effectiveness of wearing a helmet while bicycling indicates that ten years ago, approximately 35 percent of all bicyclists reported wearing helmets, whereas today that number is nearly 80 percent. Another study, however, suggests that during the same ten-year period, the number of bicycle-related accidents has increased 200 percent. These results demonstrate that bicyclists feel safer because they are wearing helmets, and they take more risks as a result. Thus, to reduce the number of serious injuries from bicycle accidents, the government should concentrate more on educating people about bicycle safety and less on encouraging or requiring bicyclists to wear helmets."
Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted
While it might be true that wearing helmet might cause bicycle riders to drive recklessly; however, the author's argument does not make a cogent sense. It is easy to understand that number of bicycle accidents might increased during past ten years, but this argument is rife with holes and assumptions therefore, not strong enough to lead to encourage bicycle riders to do not care about wearing helmets that much.
The author mentions that today the number of bicyclists who wear helmet is nearly 80 percent compare to ten years ago which was 35 percent. However, the author does not provide any information about the total number of bicyclist today and ten years ago which can make a different perspective. If the total number of bicyclist was 100 ten years ago whereas that number is 200 today and the number of bicyclists who reported wearing helmets has increases from 35 percent to 80 percent, so the percentage of bicyclist who wear helmet has not increased. In addition, the author indicated that there is 200 percent increase in bicycle-related accidents, but the author doesn't talk about the total number of bicycle riders.
Additionally, the author implies that the number of bicycle accidents has increase 200 percent; however, the author does not explain about details of these accidents. Imagine a bicycle-related accident that happened because of a car driver's high speed which does not related to wearing helmets. Moreover, a narrow bicycle lane is important to be mentioned too. For example, bicyclist who do not have enough space to ride might get accidents regardless of wearing helmets.
The author indicates that the government should concentrate more to educate people to ride safe other than education people about wearing helmet to reduce the number of bicycle accidents' injuries, but the author does not prove his/her assumption. There might be no correlation between riders' recklessness and wearing helmets.
The author can make his/her suggestion persuasive when he or she gathers information about total number of current bicycle riders compare to ten years ago and the reasons for bicycle-related accidents. After answering these questions, the author cam make such a conclusion.
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 4 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 358 350
No. of Characters: 1820 1500
No. of Different Words: 162 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.35 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.084 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.651 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 144 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 104 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 59 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 46 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 25.571 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.913 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.643 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.442 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.442 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.19 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 105, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...iders to drive recklessly; however, the authors argument does not make a cogent sense. ...
^^^^^^^
Line 2, column 665, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: doesn't
...cycle-related accidents, but the author doesnt talk about the total number of bicycle ...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, however, if, moreover, so, therefore, whereas, while, for example, in addition
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 19.6327345309 56% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 11.1786427146 81% => OK
Relative clauses : 17.0 13.6137724551 125% => OK
Pronoun: 20.0 28.8173652695 69% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 55.5748502994 74% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 16.3942115768 61% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1857.0 2260.96107784 82% => OK
No of words: 355.0 441.139720559 80% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.23098591549 5.12650576532 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.34067318298 4.56307096286 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.7355637202 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 163.0 204.123752495 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.459154929577 0.468620217663 98% => OK
syllable_count: 571.5 705.55239521 81% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 19.7664670659 71% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 25.0 22.8473053892 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 63.5089580697 57.8364921388 110% => OK
Chars per sentence: 132.642857143 119.503703932 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.3571428571 23.324526521 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.92857142857 5.70786347227 104% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.67664670659 21% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.36237587279 0.218282227539 166% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.14256986799 0.0743258471296 192% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.140872962842 0.0701772020484 201% => The coherence between sentences is low.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.193868650601 0.128457276422 151% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.14039530616 0.0628817314937 223% => More connections among paragraphs wanted.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.9 14.3799401198 111% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 46.1 48.3550499002 95% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 12.197005988 107% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.35 12.5979740519 106% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.99 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 70.0 98.500998004 71% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 12.3882235529 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.1389221557 108% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.9071856287 109% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.