This is part of a lecture by a professor of political science.
Forty years ago, the country of Byzantia started life as a parliamentary democracy, but shortly thereafter, it found itself at war with neighboring Yakistan. After spending the national coffers on arms, and sending most of its able-bodied youth to the front, Byzantia was plagued by shortages and inflation. To keep his people from rebelling while the war continued, Byzantia’s president declared a state of emergency and installed himself as dictator, a position he still holds today. Now, the tiny nation of Molivia, established just five years ago as a parliamentary democracy, is threatened by its own neighbor, and is buying up arms and training soldiers rapidly. It is no stretch at all to imagine Molivia becoming a dictatorship within the decade.”
A professor of political science predicted that the country of Molivia will follow the footsteps of Byzantia and fall from a parliamentary democracy to a dictatorship. The professor uses similarities between the two countries to support his prediction, arguing that since both countries were a parliamentary democracy, both countries were threatened by a minatory neighbor, and both countries mobolized their troops to participate in an arms race, both countries will eventually become a dictatorship. However, the professor has failed to compare other factors, such as the history, economy, and political circumstances of the two countries. Therefore, the prediction of the professor is not convincing.
First of all, the professor believed that since Byzantia was initally a parliamentary democracy but became a dictatorship, Molivia will inevitably become a dictatorship as well. However, the professor has failed to compare the history between the two countries. Suppose that throughout the history of the region now known as Byzantia, the people have been under dictatorships and parliamentary democracy was only introduced in recent years by colonizers who attempted to reform Byzantia. If this was the case, democracy is unlikely to succeed in Byzantia because Byzantia has had a dictatorial past. On the contrary, suppose that past rulers of the people in modern Molivia have used parliamentary democracy to rule their people. It would be reasonable to assume that the people of Molivia would prefer democracy and any attempt to change to dictatorship would meet a fierce opposition. The professor should compare the history of Byzantia and Molivia to understand whether the two countries have a predilection for dictatorship or democracy.
Second, the professor did not consider the economy of the two countries. The professor mentioned that after Byzantia was crippled by war, it was plagued by shortages and inflation. The professor inferred that Molivia would meet the same fate because Molivia is facing imminent conflict. However, the professor has failed to elaborate on the economy of the two countries. Suppose that the economy of Byzantia relied on agricultural products, whereas the economy of Molivia depended on electronic products. If Byzantia and Molivia were both impacted by war, the economy of Byzantia would take a harder hit because its agriculture would produces less income during wartime, whereas the economy of Molivia would be more resilient as it traded technological equipment to generate income. In addition, although Molivia is currently stockpiling weapons, its economy might be able to sustain its expenditure. The professor should compare the economy of the two countries to determine whether the economy of Molivia would become like that of Byzantia.
Finally, the professor did not compare the political circumstances of the two countries. Although Byzantia engaged in a war with its neighbor Yakistan, Molivia is only being threatened by its hostile neighbor and has not yet engaged in war. This means that it is possible that Molivia and its neighbor seek another method to resolve their differences, such as through a resolution from the United Nations. Molivia is preparing for war, but that does not signify that it will enter war.
In conclusion, the prediction of the professor is not persuasive because the professor has assumed that since Molivia was a democracy and is now mobolizing for war, it will follow the path of Byzantia and become a dictatorship. The professor assumed that the example of Byzantia was applicable for Molivia and did not compare other factors that could affect the political system of Molivia, such as its history, economy, and political circumstances. Consequently, the argument of the professor is flawed.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2023-08-03 | Mateo Chen | 63 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Sentences: 26 15
No. of Words: 589 350
No. of Characters: 3133 1500
No. of Different Words: 216 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.926 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.319 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.949 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 264 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 225 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 145 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 104 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.654 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.057 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.654 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.381 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.538 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.142 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 635, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'would' requires the base form of the verb: 'produce'
Suggestion: produce
...arder hit because its agriculture would produces less income during wartime, whereas the...
^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, finally, first, however, if, second, so, therefore, well, whereas, in addition, in conclusion, such as, first of all, on the contrary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 25.0 19.6327345309 127% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 12.9520958084 131% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 11.1786427146 161% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 13.6137724551 132% => OK
Pronoun: 36.0 28.8173652695 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 76.0 55.5748502994 137% => OK
Nominalization: 11.0 16.3942115768 67% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3210.0 2260.96107784 142% => OK
No of words: 589.0 441.139720559 134% => OK
Chars per words: 5.44991511036 5.12650576532 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.92639038232 4.56307096286 108% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.04003265856 2.78398813304 109% => OK
Unique words: 228.0 204.123752495 112% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.387096774194 0.468620217663 83% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1035.9 705.55239521 147% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.8 1.59920159681 113% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 18.0 8.76447105788 205% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.22255489022 71% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 26.0 19.7664670659 132% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 22.8473053892 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 66.5583451838 57.8364921388 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 123.461538462 119.503703932 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.6538461538 23.324526521 97% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.84615384615 5.70786347227 102% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 8.20758483034 49% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 13.0 6.88822355289 189% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 9.0 4.67664670659 192% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.207667671271 0.218282227539 95% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0723588697708 0.0743258471296 97% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0453725558862 0.0701772020484 65% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.13899111735 0.128457276422 108% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0332985673766 0.0628817314937 53% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.6 14.3799401198 108% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 32.22 48.3550499002 67% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.1628742515 156% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.2 12.197005988 116% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.63 12.5979740519 116% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.13 8.32208582834 98% => OK
difficult_words: 127.0 98.500998004 129% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 16.5 12.3882235529 133% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 11.1389221557 97% => OK
text_standard: 15.0 11.9071856287 126% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.